The Vital Abyss (Expanse, #5.5)

by James S.A. Corey

We had toilets and showers, but no privacy. When we washed ourselves, it was in front of anyone who cared to observe. We learned to shit with the casualness of animals.

I found patience easier when there was no alternative.

What astounded me was that the cutting edge of human knowledge was so close. Before I educated myself, I assumed that there was a great depth of science, that every question of importance had been cataloged, studied, that all the answers were there, if only someone could query the datasets the right way. And for some things, that was true. But for others—for things that I would have thought so important and simple that everyone would have known—the data simply wasn’t there.

When I came to myself again in the middle of the third week—ten days still remaining on my rented room—I felt weak and hungry and clear headed in a way I had not realized until then how much I missed. My mind was my own.

I’d plotted my course assuming that being competent, insightful, and easy to work with would bring reward. I astonished myself. To have come so far, through so much, and still be so naïve…

Awareness is a function of the brain just like vision or motor control or language. It isn’t exempt from being broken.”