The Wild Edge of Sorrow: Rituals of Renewal and the Sacred Work of Grief

by Francis Weller

“I noticed that you don’t talk about progress in your work.” I said, “No. I don’t see the soul moving in a linear way, from point A to point B. Sometimes it moves downward or sideways, sometimes it regresses, and at other times it holds still and doesn’t move. Progress is one of our culture’s most cherished fictions, but it can do great harm when applied to the life of the soul. As soon as we are not moving forward or progressing, we feel something is wrong and that we are failing, so we redouble our efforts. What self-compassion offers us is the space and breath to listen and take notice of how our soul is moving in this moment; what it is asking us to pay attention to at this time.”

You can say something like, “I have been carrying this grief for so long, and I cannot hold it any longer. It is too big for me. It is weighing me down and depriving me of any joy. I know you can hold this sorrow. In fact, you can turn it into something sweet for the roots that rest in your body. I do this to set down my sorrows so I can better participate in the mending of our community. Thank you for being here for me and all of us.”