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many people have a genuine impulse to work together with others as a team for a variety of social or religious causes. Relatively few communities, though, offer such organized activity to idealistic people. Cult life gives them just such an opportunity, along with the apparent benefits of “belonging” that comes from an intense group experience.
many idealistic young people recruited into cults are struggling to assert their individuality, and some are going through a period of rebellion. For these young people, cult membership can be a way of substituting cult authority figures who become a surrogate family when they are away from home.
So, what makes a person vulnerable to cults?
If he or she is like most cult members, he or she is probably approached during a time of unusual stress, perhaps while undergoing a major life transition.
Although we may succumb to mind control in weak moments, it is by no means permanent. Whenever recruits leave the group environment long enough and they begin discovering revealing books, articles or testimonies by former members, they almost always break away. The problem occurs when people rely on the group for all key information. Not knowing any better, they give the cult the benefit of the doubt. They may assume that any problem is merely the result of a member’s idiosyncratic behavior, not the system itself.
There is no room in a mind control environment for regarding the group’s beliefs as mere theory, or as a way to interpret or seek reality. The doctrine is reality.
Doctrine is to be accepted, not understood. Therefore, the doctrine must be vague and global, yet also symmetrical enough to appear consistent. Its power comes from its assertion that it is the one and only truth—and that it encompasses everything.
Since it is the “Truth,” perfect and absolute, any flaw in it is viewed as a reflection of the believer’s own imperfection. They are taught that they must follow the prescribed formula, even if they don’t really understand it. At the same time, the cult member is told that they should work harder and have more faith, so they will come to understand the truth more clearly.
Even the most complex cult doctrines ultimately reduce reality into two basic poles: black versus white; good versus evil; spiritual world versus physical world; us versus them. There is never room for pluralism. The doctrine allows no outside group to be recognized as valid (or good, or godly, or real), because that would threaten the cult’s monopoly on truth. There is also no room for interpretation or deviation.
“Devils” vary from group to group. They can be political or economic institutions (communism, socialism, or capitalism); mental-health professionals (psychiatrists, psychologists, or deprogrammers); metaphysical entities such as Satan, spirits, or aliens; or just the cruel laws of nature. Devils are certain to take on the bodies of parents, friends, ex-members, reporters, and anyone else who is critical of the group. The “huge conspiracies” working to thwart the group are, of course, proof of its tremendous importance.
Some groups cultivate a psychic paranoia, telling members that spirit beings are constantly observing them, and even taking possession of them whenever they feel or think in non-cult ways.
Members are made to feel part of an elite corps of humankind. This feeling of being special, of participating in the most important acts in human history, with a vanguard of committed believers, is strong emotional glue that keeps people sacrificing and working hard.
Ironically, members of cults look down on anyone involved in other cult groups. They are very quick to acknowledge that “Those people are in a cult” or “They are the ones who are brainwashed.” They are unable to step out of their own situations and look at themselves objectively.
The rank-and-file member is humble before superiors and potential recruits, but arrogant to outsiders.
In all destructive cults, the self must submit to group policy and the leader’s commands. The “whole purpose” or group purpose must be the focus; the “self purpose” must be subordinated. In any group that qualifies as a destructive cult, thinking of oneself or for oneself is wrong. The group comes first. Absolute obedience to superiors is one of the most universal themes in cults. Individuality is bad. Conformity is good.
A new member is often indoctrinated and groomed to give up old thought and behaviors by being paired with an older cult member, who serves as a model for the new member to imitate. In Bible groups, this is sometimes referred to as shepherding or discipling.
One of the most attractive qualities of cult life is the sense of community it fosters. The love seems to be unconditional and unlimited at first, and new members are swept away by a honeymoon of praise and attention. But after a few months, as the person becomes more enmeshed, the flattery and attention are turned away, toward newer recruits. Most members continue to believe that the group has the “highest level” of love on earth. However, experientially, the cult member learns that in the group, love is not unconditional, but depends on good performance.
Of course, when anyone does leave the group, the “love” formerly directed to them turns into anger, hatred and ridicule.
Cult members come to live within a narrow corridor of fear, guilt and shame. Problems are always their fault—the result of their weak faith, their lack of understanding, their “bad ancestors,” evil spirits, and so forth. They perpetually feel guilty for not meeting standards. The leader, doctrine and group are always right. They are wrong. They also come to believe that evil is out to get them.
Life in a cult can be like a roller-coaster. Members swing between the extreme happiness of experiencing the “truth” with an insider elite, and the crushing weight of guilt, fear and shame.
These extremes take a heavy toll on a person’s ability to function. When members are in a high state, they can convert their zeal into great productivity and persuasiveness. But when they crash, they can become completely dysfunctional.
Most groups don’t allow the “lows” to last very long. They typically send the member back through indoctrination programs to charge them up again. It is not uncommon for someone to receive a formal reindoctrination several times a year.
This is probably what Shepherding Calls were designed to do. Maybe also CO visits.
Some long-term members do burn out without actually quitting. These people can no longer take the burden or pressure of performance. They may be permanently reassigned to manual labor in out-of-the-way places, where they are expected to remain for the rest of their lives. Or, if they become a burden, they may be asked (or told) to leave.
An interesting dynamic of cults is that they tend to change people’s relationship to their past, present and future. Cult members tend to look back at their previous life with a distorted memory that colors everything dark. Even the most positive memories are skewed toward the bad.
The cult member’s sense of the present is manipulated, too. They feel a great sense of urgency about the tasks at hand. I remember well the constant feeling that a time bomb was ticking beneath my feet,
When you are kept extremely busy on critical projects all the time—for days, weeks or months—everything becomes blurred.
To a cult member, the future is a time when they will be rewarded, once the great change has finally come. Or else it will be the time when they will be punished.
In a destructive cult, there is never a legitimate reason for leaving. Unlike healthy organizations, which recognize a person’s inherent right to choose to move on, mind control groups make it very clear that there is no legitimate way to leave. Members are told that the only reasons that people leave are weakness, insanity, temptation, brainwashing (by deprogrammers), pride, sin, and so on.
Although cult members will often say, “Show me a better way and I will quit,” they are not allowed the time or given the mental tools to balance the evidence for themselves. They are locked in a psychological prison.
Essentially, Lifton outlined the totalistic notion that if you are in the group, you have a right to exist and if you leave, you do not.
When former members hide their cult involvement—whether through shame, doubt, guilt, fear or anger—they are missing a valuable opportunity: to free themselves and, by their example, to help free others.
They are role models to others in the groups they escaped from, proving that there is life after the cult.
My self-esteem was so beaten down. I was constantly being told that I had let down the group and however hard I tried to improve, it was never enough. I had resigned myself to accepting the truth that I was a hopeless cause. I felt I was unfixable and unworthy.”
Depression and self-loathing paved my way out.
as I much I hated being in that situation, I also felt like I deserved it. Even though leaving the group felt like such an act of cowardice, I felt like dead weight—that I was holding them back. I honestly felt that I was wasting their precious time and goodwill. My primary drive to leave the group was not because I thought they were bad or abusing me, but rather to relieve them of the burden of my uselessness.”
Once Hoyt was well into his recovery, he went on the offensive and sued Eternal Values and won, thereby effectively ending the group’s existence.
David, a young man in the group, felt the subtle power of the group pressuring him to become more “spiritual.” To prove his commitment to the group and be more accepted, he decided to stop taking insulin for his diabetes, believing that God would heal him. The members applauded his faith and his decision to throw away his insulin. In a matter of days, David’s health deteriorated. By the end of the week, the leader ordered around-the-clock prayer teams. Gretchen’s team was on when David took his last breath; yet the group, spurred on by the leader’s anxious exhortations, was convinced that
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even after I was thrown out, I still believed they were right and held the exclusive key to salvation.
“If I hadn’t received good counseling, I probably would have kept trying to return to the group.”
What was so interesting was that because I hadn’t written about them in the first edition, I was not on their index of banned books. The Moonies were very high profile and Jehovah’s Witnesses (JWs) knew they were a weird cult. So reading a book by a guy who was an ex-member was a curiosity for them. They would read the book expecting to learn about the Moonies and other cults, and wind up realizing they were in a cult.
I started working not only with people recruited into the Watchtower Society but also people who were born and raised in the group, and I received hundreds of letters and phone calls. Most of the folks who had read my books wanted to know, “What if I don’t have a pre-cult self to go back to? How do I get well?” I knew that I needed to begin addressing the issues for those who had been influenced from childhood by a totalistic group. Through my investigations and experiences, I have come to believe that human beings are all born with an authentic self as well as a desire for love, fairness,
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People who choose to exit a group where they know they will likely be cut off—shunned, disconnected from by all of their family and friends—face incredible suffering, pain and hardship. The level of pain is unimaginable for the average person. If those trying to exit do not succumb to the pressures to return to the group, they can become resilient and strong. They often become staunch atheists or strong believers in the Bible, God or some Higher Power.
Lee received permission from the elders to get counseling. However, she was forbidden to tell her counselor that she was a Jehovah’s Witness.
For all the victims of Watchtower ideology, Armageddon is a real event that could strike at any moment. It is a time when divine forces will be unleashed to kill pretty much everyone who isn’t a Jehovah’s Witness, and the idea that Armageddon is “just around the corner” has been instilled in Witnesses of all ages for decades.
A year later, in 2009, Lloyd withdrew as an elder and decided that he and his wife would move to Croatia, to be near her parents. For the first year Lloyd attended the local meetings and tried to settle into his new congregation. However, due to the language barrier, he could no longer understand what was being taught at the meetings and gradually unplugged from his indoctrination. And he started to ask himself, “What do I believe?” Doubts from his youth began to resurface.
Tom was taught to believe that the Mormon Church represented everything in life that was good and true—and the only way to eternal happiness. He was also taught that anything contrary to the teachings of the church was false, evil and of the Devil—and, of course, would lead to unhappiness.
Meanwhile, the more perfectly Tom practiced his Mormon faith, the more he lived in a world of guilt and shame, always seeking forgiveness. He became obsessed with trying to be worthy, in order to have “the spirit” with him.
When he took the sacrament, or went to the temple, he made covenants to be obedient to the strict commandments of God and Church standards. But he also knew that, even as he made those promises, he—like everyone else—would fall short of perfection, and would need to repent over and over again. This routine often led to shame, hopelessness, two-faced hypocritical behavior and a habit of breaking commitments. This can be the perfect recipe to create addiction.
To this day, Tom doesn’t feel that the Mormon Church or its leaders are intentionally malicious—but that they do harmful things, because they believe that the ends justify the means. The church’s leaders and followers are indoctrinated to believe that the Mormon Church is the true religion, and they cannot stand the idea of their friends and family suffering, or going to hell, or attaining a lower degree of glory, because they are not active in the Church.
People are entitled to make their own decisions, even bad ones, if they are legally considered adults.
For some individuals, membership may have a destructive effect, while the organization as a whole may not meet the significant criteria of a destructive cult.
