Black Number Four

by Kandi Steiner

Stop acting like hanging out with me is the bane of your existence.” “I’m not one to cover up the truth.” I smirk.

“Let’s go. I want to wear you out and sitting on this sandbar isn’t going to do it.” “Well shit, Skyler, if you wanted to get me in bed that bad we could have skipped this altogether.”

it’s not her smile. Not the real one. I know that smile, I take pride in putting that smile on her face – but this? This is not it. Her eyes are soft, but distant – the light is missing. Holy shit. I think she’s giving me her poker face.

“What’s wrong, you going to act shy around me now?” I flush red. “No. Maybe I didn’t want to sit on your lap, ever think of that?” He looks a little hurt, his brows bunching together, but then he pulls me tighter and thrusts his hips up a little. I feel him through his pants, his hard on pressing into the fabric of my dress. “Maybe I need you on my lap right now. Ever think of that?” I swallow hard,

It’s like he was watching me the entire time, as if his eyes are trained to spot me like the missing puzzle piece he needs to complete his picture.

When she finally lifts her head, her face is pale, her hand shaking in mine. I want desperately to pull her into me, but the way she’s looking at me – like I’m a wounded animal and she’s the one who shot me – stops me from moving. I feel paralyzed by her gaze, immobilized by the words I haven’t even heard yet.

“Kip, please, just leave it alone. Just let me go.” “No!” I yell, louder than I expected. I don’t know what the hell I’m doing right now. This wasn’t part of the plan, none of this was – but I can’t stop myself. I refuse to let her go.

She’s always been more. From the moment I met her, there was a constant pull – a spell that bound me to her,

It kills me to play this game with her, but at this point, I have no choice. Wanting more with her is fucking stupid and I should have seen that from the very beginning. I let myself get too caught up with her and now I have to pay the price. Being friends with her kills me, being anything more than that isn’t going to happen, and being anything less means I can’t do my job. This in-between shit hurts and every time Skyler looks at me with those blue eyes of hers, I feel my resolve weaken.

The tension that built between us earlier at the gym has only magnified since we got in the cab. Skyler and I don’t do close very well. Or, rather, we do it too well,

“You have incredible eyes. I know if I was at the table, I’d be distracted by them.”

I don’t want Erin. It’s you I want.”

I knew she still cared about me, but I don’t think I realized just how much I still cared about her.

“That’s a risk I’m willing to take, if it means I might get you in the end.”

“Be careful, Jackson. That almost sounded like you were falling for me.” I swallow hard, tucking my hands a little tighter around her waist and resting my head on her shoulder.

Kade rolls his eyes. “Seriously? She’s a cool girl? Come on, bro, this is me you’re talking to. I can see the way you two are looking at each other and if you don’t watch it, other people will start to catch on, too. It’s not over between you two, is it?”

Every scenario I play out in my head ends with a slap to the face and the girl I want walking away from me for good. I can’t risk that.

I just want to be me. And me likes Kip. A lot.

“I’m beginning to think as long as you’re in it, I don’t really care what happens anymore.”

don’t cheat our lucky number! Have faith in it!”

I see the way he looks at you. He isn’t done, Skyler. He’s not going anywhere.

Here I am, giving up everything I’ve ever wanted, risking the relationship with my father thinking maybe Skyler is worth it. No, knowing she is.

“I love you,” I say the words before I can stop myself, but I mean them just as much as I did the first time I said them. She chokes a little, her face twisting as tears start to fall. “Well I fucking hate you.”

“I’m in love with Skyler.” There’s a short pause on his end, but then he clears his throat. “I know, Son. I’ve known for a while.”

Skyler is just like this tournament. She’s a freezeout. There are no re-buys, no second chances – and I rode the blinds and played it safe before betting it all on a hand that couldn’t win. With her, I know it’s over. I know she’s done. We’re done. But something inside me refuses to let her go.