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“Do you know you have stars in your eyes?” Abraham’s words are soft. Spoken low. “I can see them clearly. Your wishes.”
“Do you wish for me to kiss you again?”
“I wish for you never to stop.”
If this is ruin, let me be a man in shambles.
“If we are, will you fight for me, my warrior?” “With my every breath,” I promise, the certainty of it startling me.
“Will you think of me while you’re away?” His response nearly sets my heart on fire. “How could I not? Forgetting you must mean I am dead, for I cannot see how it would be possible otherwise.”
“If this is a dream, I hope I can return.”
I feel as if I must be going mad, Abraham. To want you so.” I twist his hand in mine, letting the sting in my throat settle before speaking. “Then we will be mad together.”
“I wasn’t made to resist you, Jasper Sinclair.” “I do not wish for you to try.”
“You are beautiful, my star. If I could, I would spend eternity here with you, and I wouldn’t want for anything. I would look into your eyes and have everything I need.”
“Do you find me handsome, Jasper?” His voice is full of nothing but earnestness. “Very. You make my breath come short and my heart leap. I never felt that for another before you. I didn’t know, at first, what to make of it.” I run my fingers along his jaw, the skin smooth and warm. “I think you’re the most beautiful man I’ve ever set eyes on,” I tell him seriously. “But even if I didn’t have eyes, I would want you just the same.”
“Jasper.” He rocks me, his face buried in my hair. “My heart. My star. My love. Whoever it was that wove the fabric of my being did it with you in mind. I was made to love you. And I will do so no matter where on this earth you are. My love for you will never, ever flicker out.” “Then I will look at the stars,” I say, voice catching, “and be reminded of it every day.”
“Because, Charlotte Valentine, you are my heart. If you are hurting, then so am I.”
“Do you think you could love me again after what you’ve learned?” Arthur’s eyes snap to mine, clarity returning. His voice comes out on a breath. “My love. I’ve never stopped.”
“How is this so easy for you?” His voice trembles, words hoarsely spoken. “You do not ridicule me. Do not look at me with disgust. I don’t understand how you can possibly accept it.”
“So you accept me? As I am?” “Exactly as you are.”
As archaic as it is, in the eyes of those around us, you belong to me. And I’m never handing you back. I’d rather perish than cause you injury, internal or otherwise. So if you wish to never wear a dress again, we will close our doors and become hermits.”
I’m more than certain there’s not a storm I couldn’t weather, so long as I have you at my side.” Arthur’s eyes are wet, his inhale measured but shaky. “To hear you say so is a great joy. And it will be my honor to stand at your side through rain and thunder, my dear heart. Sunshine, too, for I hope we have plenty of it.”
I loved him before. From almost the very start. But what I feel now seeing Charlie find the person he was always meant to be? It can’t be categorized by four simple letters. It’s so much grander than love. Far more vast and dangerous. I fear I would burn the world down just to watch Charlie walk free.
“Art. I cannot imagine many people have the capability to love someone the way you love me. I will never take for granted the breadth of your heart. Please know it is always safe with me.”
I don’t speak it aloud, but what I’ve always known is that Charlie and my heart are one and the same. There’s no splitting the two apart. I was made to love Charlie Valentine, now Kane. No matter the form in which he came to me.
“I know it’s sad. Terribly sad. But that sword reminds me of how powerful love can be. It’s a weapon far greater than any steel. And no one, not even a vengeful god, can take it away.” The pain in my chest at Charlie’s words is visceral, an ache that has me clutching his hand tight. “And what of our love, dear heart?” Charlie’s head turns my way, his eyes specks of light in the dark. “It will outlast all the stars, Arthur. Every last one of them.”
“Charlie, you will always be my heart, no matter how many times your name may change. No matter your body or age or the years we see pass. There is nothing in this universe that would stop me from loving you. Dare I say not even death.”
“Do you know what I felt when I first met Gray? It was like I’d found a piece of myself that had been living outside of my body. And I didn’t even know it until he was close enough to bring it home. If soulmates are a thing, he’s mine. It’s not romantic. It doesn’t have to be. He’s part of me, and I would no sooner cut out my own lungs than be without that man in my life.”
“I’d leave it all behind for you.” His breath puffs out. “I know. But I don’t need you to.”
No one believes us, that we could possibly want to spend our lives together—share years and create memories—without a sexual or romantic component. But why can’t we? Ezra is my person. And I’m his. I’ve never questioned it, not once in the last twenty years. I found him, and I knew. I love that man more than I’ll ever love anybody, my own daughter withstanding. Why can’t love, in any form, be enough? People want to shape us into something we’re not because they can’t see the beauty there. They don’t understand it, and I ache with that knowledge. Because don’t they realize? Love is boundless.
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My heart thumps in time to Ezra’s soft smile. God. Even across space and time, I can feel him. “Grayson Fox.” Ezra’s tone is almost lazy, as if the name is one he’s maybe heard before. “Yeah. That man is the love of my life.”
“I would say I’d have loved you in whatever form you came to me. In whatever time. I would defend you with my dying breath, and I would follow you wherever it is you go. The pieces of us were made to fit, Gray. To be drawn together and shared. You told me once bound stars are destined to go out together. And I’m glad for it. Because I can’t imagine a life, now or ever, without you in it.”
Maybe we can’t live forever. But I know down to my marrow—wherever his soul goes, mine will follow.
“If it is real, I’ll find you in the next life.” I inhale a shuddering breath, looking at his outline in the dark. I don’t need light to know the man beside me. I know him as I know the beat of my heart. And if, as he says, there is a next life? I have no doubt he’ll find me there. I lift Grayson’s hand again, my lips brushing his skin. “I’ll be waiting.”
“I love you, Grayson Fox. With everything I am and everything I will be. Don’t ever forget that.”
“Every time… Every time, it’s me?” I nod. “How do you know?” “I just do,” I tell him. “I’d know you anywhere.”
You left to keep us safe. I know you did. Our love would not be accepted, no matter how right we knew it to be in our hearts.
Do you remember the day you returned to me? I thought it must be a dream. You looked different than my memories of you. Older. There were tears in your eyes, and I thought for certain I must be dead, too. For what else could explain you appearing before me?
It’s been thirty-two years since that day, my love. Thirty-two years tucked away in this home all our own. I can see you now through the window, tending to our gardens, the bees flitting around your head. A smile sits on your face, and I ache with it. I love you more than I have ever loved another. I love you as only I can. Wholly. Absolute. I suspect we have many years yet left, my heart. We have not much, but we do not need it. Our roof, our hearth, our bed. It is enough. I would not change a single facet of this life we’ve shared.
I cannot claim to know what waits for us when we leave this world. But I beg of you to make the same promise you gave me that night so very long ago. No matter where, no matter when, be it swiftly that you return to me. From now until the last star blinks its final breath, Your beloved Abraham.
“Do you believe in fate, Lee?” His eyes hold my own, brown and gold mixing in a hue I’d recognize anywhere. Any time. “I believe in you, my love. Which is why I can say with absolute certainty… I love you. In this and every life.”
I wanted to be loved, and I was. For millennia. Time and time again. And I’ll be loved still, for an eternity to come.
“This and every life,” I repeat. My own promise. My own vow. The absolute and utter truth. “I am yours, my warrior. And I will love you until everything goes dark.”
