Please Don't Go (The Midnight Strike, #1)

by E. Salvador

To anyone who’s ever felt they didn’t deserve to be seen.

When you stop fighting the current that keeps dragging you under. When you finally cave and let it take you. When you accept taking the grim reaper’s hand.

It’s perfect because in the darkness, I easily blend in. Though it really doesn’t matter. Even in the daytime, I’m nobody to everyone.

Words, that’s all they are. Meaningless and insignificant; anyone can say them and make you feel special.

“You can’t miss someone you don’t know,” I angrily snap. “Then let me know you,” he counters determinedly. “I want to know you.”

I hope I’m enough to anchor her, enough she can feel and understand that I’ll be her lifeline.

So many have called me empathetic, and there’s nothing wrong with that, but I’ve been screwed over by it.

Night and day are one, and I feel chained to the middle, not being able to experience either but watching them regardless.

It feels like I’m sitting in front of a television, watching my life play out. It’s all slow, excruciatingly so, but everyone and everything around me are all moving too fast. I can’t keep up.

I thought getting out of bed was tiring, but forcing a smile completely wears me out.

when her eyes collide with mine, I’m struck by how little I see and how much I feel.

“Your favorite color is yellow, but you don’t like neon yellow.”

“That doesn’t mean anything,” she hollowly whispers. “That means everything,”

“I want to meet the person who over inflated your ego. I need a word or two with them.”

And I want to meet the person who fucked her over. I’ll have more than words with them.

I know I’m thinking too much into something so simple but it really…threw me off.

Right, because that’s every girl’s dream, to hear their boyfriend’s thinking of them while their dick is in someone else.

“To evaporate. That’s a great start.”

“Why are you always so insistent?” “Because if I’m not, who will be?”

Those words are all it takes to confiscate the little bit of air left in my lungs. I know he’s not saying that because I’m here at the party; he’s saying that because I’m here. I’m alive.

And for a moment, his back to the world, his figure shielding me from it all, his smile that does weird things to my stomach, I feel a bit…fine.

Maybe she wants to purposely stay in the shadows because she thinks that’s where she belongs, but that would never work for her because I see her.

She is light, a blinding color that’s hard to ignore. Like a lighthouse guiding you home.

I hide behind smiles and being the life of a party, but I’m nothing but a big fucking fraud.

Like a moth to a flame, I can’t stop looking at her.

I don’t know who gave up on her, but I know I won’t.

Estás seguro?” “Contigo, siempre.”

"are you sure?" "with you, always"

“I’m here because despite what you believe, you’re not a problem and you’re not broken. I’m not trying to fix you. I just want you to know that I’m here for you. As a friend, as a person, as whatever you want me to be. I’m here for you, Josefine. Whoever or whatever made you believe that is wrong.”

The reminder makes the knot feel like it somehow slipped out of my throat and is now snaking around it like a noose.

In retrospect, if I don’t overbook myself, I’ll get lost in my head, and that’s currently a dangerous place to be. There’s hardly any light filtering through, and I know the moment it gets pitch black, I won’t be able to shut down the ugly thoughts still lurking in the back of my head.

“My brain short-circuits when I’m around you,”

His eyes have always been so bright; I never noticed the shadow hiding behind them.

It’s weird how silence can feel so loud, so suffocating, so isolating.

“You’re really willing to spend the rest of your life with me?” I don’t know why I play along but I do. “Yes.” His knuckles brush against mine. My cheeks flame. “Are you sure you want that?” “I’m sure it’s what I need,”

Just tell me when and where and I’m yours forever.” Something sounds different now, but I’m sure I’m reading into it. “Be careful what you wish for.” “I know. That’s why I’m wishing for

“Take it or take it. I’m not going to argue with you, Josefine.” “You mean take it or leave it?” My heart stutters at the graze of her hand against mine. “Usually but this isn’t negotiable. I’m going to be here and I really want to be useful to you.”

I see you, Daniel,”

I can’t remember the last time I actually felt human. Like I’m in my body and not outside of it, watching life happen around me.

The void in my chest is nowhere near or even halfway full, but I feel something enough that I don’t dread waking up in the mornings. I don’t know what to call that, but I feel…okay. And okay is the most I’ve ever felt.

I really wish I could because maybe then I’d believe that someone decided to look past my flaws and like me anyway because I was enough it didn’t matter. But things don’t work that way. No one just looks past the flaws and decides they like you that much to stay. Maybe it works for other people but not for me.

“You know, I see you. You can act like whatever you feel doesn’t matter, but it does.”

“Aw, you’re opening up to me. Did I just unlock another level in our friendship?” “Yeah, sure, whatever. We leveled up, I guess,”

How hannah and i's friendship started

“These aren’t just because flowers. These are I care about you flowers. I think about you flowers. I want you flowers. You mean a lot to me flowers. No guy goes out of their way to buy a shit ton of flowers if you don’t mean something to them. These are I like you flowers.”

All of a sudden, my clothes feel too tight on me, my skull painfully throbs, and my chest flares with anxiety.

Impending doom is what I’ve been feeling recently. I know why and I wish I could make it go away. I wish I could shut my brain off from the memory, but I can’t.

I’m not what she needs, but she’s who I want.

the emptiness in my chest far too intense for nothing to be residing in it. No, something is there. No, someone is in there.

I can’t explain it; I felt wired, and I guess in a way…I was high, not on drugs but on Josie. She just makes me feel alive and on top of the world. It’s like she injected herself in my veins and all I feel is euphoria rushing through my body.

I feel alive. That’s what talking to her makes me feel.

“I’m so happy you’re here, Josie.” I caress her cheek. “I’m so happy you’re here, Garcia,”