Something Like Lightning

by Jay Bell

“Your aunt called,” Laisha said. “She wants to know what you want for your birthday.” “Money,” Kelly answered immediately, not taking his eyes off his homework. “You haven’t given us many ideas either,” his mother continued. “I miss those lists you’d make when you were little. Always in alphabetical order.” “I can still do that,” Kelly replied. He thought a moment and glanced up. “Cash. Followed by gold, money, stocks, and wealth.” “Why do you need so much money?” his father asked. “I plan on blowing most of it on horse races. The rest will go to booze and rent boys.” Doug paused his game and raised an eyebrow. “Rent boys?” “Male prostitutes,” Laisha said, “and before you panic, he’s kidding.” “I sure hope so,” Doug replied. “Gay or not, our boy is too handsome to pay for it.” Kelly shook his head. “Awkward. Thank you, but seriously… Awkward.” “Then tell us what you want,” his mother said. “I’m saving up for a new camera lens. I need to buy it myself, since there are complicated technical details and compatibility issues to keep in mind.” “Then maybe we’ll take you shopping for one,” Laisha said. “Or how about a nice disposable camera?” his father suggested. “You use them once and drop them off at the drugstore. No fuss, no muss.” Kelly ignored him and addressed his mother. “Telephoto lenses are expensive, but maybe we could combine my birthday and Christmas presents into one.” “You won’t be sad, having nothing to open on one of those holidays?” “Absolutely not,” Kelly sai...

how can they sleep with a girl if they’re really gay? How can they even get it up?” Kelly shrugged. “Hormones are hormones. Tell anyone this and I’ll kill you, but I once jacked off to Aladdin.” “The cartoon?” William asked. “Yeah. I was thirteen and clueless, okay? Besides, Aladdin is kind of hot. But that doesn’t mean I’m Disneysexual or whatever.” William laughed. “Yeah, but at least Aladdin is a guy.” “He’s a two-dimensional drawing of a guy wearing parachute pants, a dopey vest, and a fez. My point is that when we’re horny, all sorts of crazy things can turn us on.” William frowned and went back to contemplating the grass. “Returning to my original scenario,” Kelly said. “Say you’re in a room with the hottest guy in the world on your left, and the hottest woman in the world on your right. Which direction are you going to be looking?” “Is anyone watching me?” William asked. “No. Better yet, you’re invisible. No one can see you no matter what, and the guy and girl are both slowly getting undressed. Which one do you want to see get naked?” William was silent for a moment. Then, under his breath, he swore. He sounded miserable, like it was the worst news possible. Kelly remembered feeling overwhelmed when figuring out the truth, but also sort of excited, like an entire new world had opened up to him. Maybe William just needed to say it, to finally get it out in the open. “Which one?” Kelly pressed. “The guy,” William snapped. “I’d want to watch the guy.” “Is that so bad?”...

“Well?” Kelly said as soon as he was near. “I’m gay,” William moaned. “And I’m fucking exhausted.” Kelly smiled. “I have that effect on a lot of people.”

Kelly was checking his cell phone, but he didn’t hear a peep from William. Not until late that night when the house had fallen silent. i need to see you Okay, Kelly texted back. Where? can I come over? Kelly hesitated. He didn’t have a strict curfew, so long as he didn’t abuse his freedom. But his mother preferred a quiet house at night. Even when Jared used to sleep over, they had to keep it down past a certain hour. Then again, he could hardly abandon his boyfriend at a time like this. Okay. Drive safe. He sat on the edge of his bed, deciding the news couldn’t be good. Otherwise, William would have texted him something cheerful before making plans for tomorrow. After enough time had passed, he went out to the driveway. A familiar car pulled up soon after. Kelly expected William to look downtrodden, but instead he glowered openly, as if angry with the world. Kelly even took a step back when William marched toward him. So much for his smiling saint. This was someone new. “He’s gone,” William said, his voice much too loud. “The bastard took off while I was in school.” “Easy,” Kelly said, glancing around. “Let’s go to the backyard. And try to keep it down, okay?” “Fine,” William huffed. He continued to do so as Kelly led him around to the gate in the privacy fence. Their property included a yard that could best be described as long and narrow. This was good, since it put distance between them and the house. They walked all the way to the end, where trees and bushes obscured ...

“Happy anniversary.” “Yeah,” Kelly said. “It’s been an amazing six months. Six and a half,” he added quickly. William looked exasperated. “It’s been memorable to say the least. Listen, I’ll probably be in a lot of trouble, so…” Kelly grimaced. “Yeah, I know. We’ll still see each other in school, right?” “Right. They can’t take that away from us. If only Romeo and Juliet had the same lunch period, the whole tragedy could have been averted.”

“I don’t really care about honesty,” Jason continued, “or being totally understood or any of the other stuff, because being human is all about messing up and breaking trust and telling lies. I wouldn’t want to be with someone perfect. Just some humble, totally normal guy will do.”

“Zwei Berliner Weisse,”

Two Berliner Weisse

“Noch was dazu?”

Anything else

I’m a survivor. I didn’t let the cruelty of others wear me down, and I’ve weathered the more subtle hardships of the heart. Love is a Trojan horse, slipping past your guard and leaving you ransacked and vulnerable. I emerged from that war not unscathed but as a new man.