“What’s the scoop?” Rayford asked. Chloe imitated the recorded voice. “‘The number you have dialed has been disconnected. The new number is . . .’” “Is what?” She handed him a scrap of paper. The area code was for New York City. Rayford sighed. “Do you have Buck’s new number?” “It’s on the wall by the phone.”
This passage is the entirety of a scene. You can imagine my rage when I turned the page and saw FOUR scene breaks on a single page. That’s four POV changes between two characters in one page! The only excuse for that kind of writing is when you’re trying to pull an action scene where everything is synchronized and all the timing matters. Bruce Barnes’s church had better explode on the next page.
