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We can hide in a cupboard under the stairs our whole life and it’ll still find us. Death will show up wearing an invisible cloak and it will wave a magic wand and whisk us away when we least expect it. It will erase every trace of our existence on this earth and it will do all this work for free. It will ask for nothing in return. It will take a bow at our funeral and accept the accolades for a job well done and then it will disappear.
I’m beginning to think of hope as a dangerous, terrifying thing.
“I want to be the friend you fall hopelessly in love with. The one you take into your arms and into your bed and into the private world you keep trapped in your head. I want to be that kind of friend,” he says. “The one who will memorize the things you say as well as the shape of your lips when you say them. I want to know every curve, every freckle, every shiver of your body, Juliette—”
“Please.” He says “Please don’t shoot me for this.” And he kisses me.
“The truth,” he says, “is a painful reminder of why I prefer to live among the lies.”
“Today is our day to die, ladies.” Adam shoves him. A little. “Oh, so now you’re abusing the crippled kid, huh?” Kenji takes a moment to steady himself before punching Adam in the arm.
Rain is popping against the roof like popcorn against a pane of glass.
The flames lick the earth, lapping up the oxygen,
My bones begin to thaw and my teeth are slowing their chatter and my muscles are learning to relax. My hair floats up around my face and I feel it tickle my nose. I sink beneath the surface. I fall asleep.
And I’d start by killing Anderson. It’s too bad I’m already so close to dead.
I’m looking around and wondering at this strange version of an afterlife. Odd, that Warner is here, that I still can’t seem to move, that I still feel such extraordinary pain. Stranger still to see Sonya and Sara in front of me. I can’t even pretend to understand their presence in this picture.
Mass chaos is in my future. And I’m leaving my gloves behind.