Unravel Me (Shatter Me, #2)

by Tahereh Mafi

I am nothing more than the consequence of catastrophe.

It’s the kind of smile that flushes humiliated heat up my neck and spears my pride right through the vertebrae.

But time is beyond our finite comprehension. It’s endless, it exists outside of us; we cannot run out of it or lose track of it or find a way to hold on to it. Time goes on even when we do not.

“I was running late to meet you, your highness. I didn’t have time to put my socks on.”

i love Kenji so much 😭

“Don’t deny me, Juliette. I’m a lonely man.”

KENJI ✋🏼😭

“Adam is jealous of our love.”

Kenji is an ICON

“This is kind of like that. Your boy is a freaking train wreck.”

Kenji sighs. Waves his hand with a bow and a flourish. “After you, princess.”

I can’t name and my brain won’t stop screaming and my lungs keep catching fire and it’s too much too much too much too much

And I understand, for the first time, that I have the power to destroy everything.

My mouth tastes like death.

I don’t even understand what I’m capable of.

I don’t know how to be a verb, an adverb, any kind of modifier. I’m a noun through and through.

I’m blushing fiercely, wondering why embarrassment always feels like ice water in my veins.

I step into the sea of blue in his eyes, dive right in and drown.

I feel like I’m trapped in someone else’s story.

That’s why Adam’s skin was always so hot when we were together. Why it was always so intense when he was with me. His ability was working to fight mine. His energy was working to defuse mine. It was exhausting him. Weakening his defenses.

nooooo, that's sooo sad 😭

Adam is not immune to me.

It’s killing me to know that I have to rebuild the walls I’d so carelessly demolished the moment he came back into my life.

I hate it so much I could scream.

It’s the kind of kiss that makes you realize oxygen is overrated.

Birds don’t fly, is what the scientists say, but history says they used to.

I encapsulate a world of nothing.

I find myself thinking about Warner too much.

I have no idea what could propel a 19-year-old man boy person into such a miserable, murderous lifestyle

Synonyms know each other like old colleagues, like a set of friends who’ve seen the world together. They swap stories, reminisce about their origins and forget that though they are similar, they are entirely different, and though they share a certain set of attributes, one can never be the other. Because a quiet night is not the same as a silent one, a firm man is not the same as a steady one, and a bright light is not the same as a brilliant one because the way they wedge themselves into a sentence changes everything.

Loneliness is a strange sort of thing. It creeps up on you, quiet and still, sits by your side in the dark, strokes your hair as you sleep. It wraps itself around your bones, squeezing so tight you almost can’t breathe. It leaves lies in your heart, lies next to you at night, leaches the light out from every corner. It’s a constant companion, clasping your hand only to yank you down when you’re struggling to stand up.

“You don’t look so good, princess.

KENJI!!! 🤭

“that maybe he’s looking for someone something?”

he's looking for you! 😱

“He’s not joking,” Brendan says to me. “And I hope you know how to use a gun.”

ohhhh, i think she does 🤭

I realize now that it was his way of telling me he trusts me.

There’s a fine layer of snow powdered over everything, as if the Earth was making a weak attempt to cover up its ugly bits just before we arrived.

He is a strange, strange, twisted boy.

He has dimples.

Warner who’s now looking around like he’s just seen a ghost, blinking and rubbing his eyes like he’s confused, glancing at the dog like maybe the little animal managed to bewitch him.

“Not everyone can do it—not all abilities are the same—but maybe if you manage to stop being a dumbass long enough not to die, I might be able to teach you one day.”

KENJI ✋🏼😭

Sometimes I wonder about glue. No one ever stops to ask glue how it’s holding up. If it’s tired of sticking things together or worried about falling apart or wondering how it will pay its bills next week.

Juliette cracks me up 😭

Because my skin will never change.

“You digest your prey,” he said to me, laughing as though it was amusing, as though it was funny, as if it was perfectly acceptable to compare a girl to a carnivorous plant. Flattering, even.

“So you’re exactly like a Venus flytrap. You reel ’em in. Clamp ’em down. Eat ’em up.”

What I really want to say is who the hell are you and who are you to decide who gets to die. Who are you to decide who should be killed. Who are you to tell me which father I should destroy and which child I should orphan and which mother should be left without her son, which brother should be left without a sister, which grandmother should spend the rest of her life crying in the early hours of the morning because the body of her grandchild was buried in the ground before her own.

“What?” Oh how fascinating look at this fork and this spoon and this table. “What do y—”

oh my gosh, why is this me though. i've definitely done this before 😭

Warner. I can’t get the image of his smiling, laughing face out of my head.

“I’m going to go get more coffee.” “I thought you said it was disgusting.” He levels a look at me. “Yes, but I am a sad, sad man with very low standards.”

In other words: his office is a mess. Not something I was expecting from someone so incredibly put-together.

Kenji swears. Adam is frozen. I’m confused.

3 different people; 3 different reactions

and they’re starting to put the pieces together; they’re starting to realize there’s another movement—our movement—preparing to fight back.

“He’s taken four of our men hostage, Kenji. I’m afraid we don’t have another choice.”

“This is what we’re here for, right?” I look around. “We’re supposed to fight back. This is our chance.”

And I realize this is probably what I’m meant to do. Maybe this is exactly why I’m here. Maybe I’m just supposed to die.