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“That was a lot of things,” I say, narrowing my gaze at her naked back as she tugs on her sweater. “But stupid is not one of them.”
My eyes widen. “What the fuck? No, and it wasn’t what I—”
My heartbeat hasn’t slowed down at all since I fled Asher’s dorm, and I’m a little afraid it never will.
He came just from watching me. I didn’t know it could happen
No one tells you what to do if you find his lack of control more arousing.
It’s not really that different from the stress of school or my sadness keeping me awake instead.
entrenched in the tainted fabric of this school
To them, and even Avernia alike, if you can’t directly contribute to society in a way that benefits those in power, you don’t deserve rights or equity. Which is utter bullshit, but I digress. The government and higher education being disasters is nothing new.
“You don’t want to go out with me,” I say finally, something unsettling in my stomach, like a boat being thrashed on angry seas.
Strong muscle strains against the fabric of his pants, and a bit of sweat percolates between my breasts, dripping from my bra as I recall how sturdy and masculine it felt, how primal and desperate I was—
“That isn’t what you said in my bed the other day—” Reaching beneath the table, I grab his thigh, pinching the inside before he has a chance to stop me. I put all my strength into it, gritting my teeth; he jolts, his hand immediately coming to cover mine as he drags my chair closer. He grunts, wrenching my fingers from his leg, and then tangles ours together, drawing them into his lap.
Foxe drops into her now-empty chair, kicking his legs up on the table. He lets out a low whistle, popping another cookie into his mouth. “Boy, does she hate you.” I shoot him a dirty look. “She does not hate me.” “Sure seems like she does.” He cocks his head to the side, studying her retreat. “She looks good walking away from you too, huh?” My arm lashes out, my fist connecting with his injured shoulder. He winces, losing balance for a split second. One of his cookies falls, and he groans. “Look what you made me do!” “Quit perving on your fucking relative, you cretin.” “What? Is it my fault
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Sometimes the wheel turns because it’s the natural progression of things. The consequences of a person’s actions. Evolution manifesting. A curse set in motion long before any of us here now were even born.
I didn’t realize sex was so consuming. That being intimate with someone would feel like ripping open your chest to bare your soul and letting them put their hands all over it.
He turns his head, and I feel him looking down at me. “You don’t miss it? Being young and carefree?” I miss you.
“You had me.” He doesn’t mention Aurora, or Foxe, or my siblings. Just himself. My eyes burn. “And that was supposed to be enough?” “It was for me.” “Don’t, Asher. You can’t rewrite history when I was there. I wasn’t enough for you.” Emotion clogs my throat, and I withdraw to wet more towels. “That’s why I came and forged a path at college all on my own. Not because I wanted to, but because there was no other choice.”
thumps a staccato rhythm, beating hard against my ribs, as I take the gauze from him. Holding up the roll of medical tape, I stretch out the length for what I need and raise it to his mouth. Leaning forward, Asher pulls back his lips, baring his teeth, and bites through the tape. Slowly, the piece tears in two.
I’ve never been in a fight in my life.” “Except with me.” “Well, that’s different. I was always safe with you.” The words come out before I can stop them or fully weigh their meaning.
I smooth my fingers over the gauze before I realize what I’m doing. Asher’s breath hitches,
I push my index finger into the gauze, watching blood swarm to soak the spot. Asher hisses through clenched teeth, whipping around and grabbing my wrist, yanking me into him. “It won’t stop hurting if you keep poking it.” My chin lifts. “Maybe I don’t want it to stop hurting.” His chest heaves,
Despite my anger and loneliness. Right here, in Asher’s orbit, it’s warm. Safe.
“Close your eyes.” Sucking in a deep breath, I do as he says, cutting off that sense from the increasing discomfort. The only problem now is that I’m hyperaware of him, especially as he moves so his legs bracket mine, his groin grinding against my hip. I don’t feel what I did that day in his dorm, but I remember how it felt—how
One of his hands finds my back, and he presses softly on my spine at the same time as he’s squeezing water from my hair. My eyes pop open, and I swallow. A shiver skates across my skin. Asher clears his throat, stepping away. I stand upright, letting out a wobbly breath, and meet his dark gaze in the mirror. His stare this time is heated. Fiery.
I can’t focus on anything except how close he is, how good he smells. “Luce,” he says in the lowest voice. It’s almost a whisper. “Can I…” My mouth is dry as a desert. “I should be getting to my date.” Something shifts in his expression, turning sinister. “Don’t.” “Why?” I quirk a brow, the most movement I can manage. “Are you jealous or some—” “Yes.” He steps in, our chests brushing. Bending down, he plants his hands on either side of the sink, trapping me. “Yes, I’m jealous. I want to be the only one who ever sees you this close.” His hand finds my jaw, angling my head as he leans in. My
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“Let me kiss you,” he exhales, his fingers sliding over my skin. “Please. If you still want to go on your date after, I’ll step aside, but… Fuck, Luce, I need to kiss you right now.”
“Does it feel like you might die if you don’t kiss me?” Say yes. Let me know I’m not alone at least.
“Only if you kill me for this,” he says before sealing his mouth to mine.
“What exactly are we doing?” Asher replies, moving to ghost kisses along the side of my neck, then up the column of my throat. “You’re kissing me.” He pulls back with a big, goofy grin on his face. “Fuck yeah, I am.” Catching my breath becomes impossible. His lips stretch with my silence. “I’ve got no intention of stopping either,
My soul is disturbed. Moved by his existence.
It’s always been that way. Pretending otherwise is futile.
spreading like honey
taste my pulse in my throat and cling to him like I might die if I stop.
Along with the rush of a climax, panic winds beside it, trying to lace its fangs into the euphoria. Air escapes me, and I struggle for a moment to separate the two and step out of my head, to allow my release at the hands of a man who has broken me before. Paranoia and anxiety tell me it’ll happen again, but he’s making my body feel so good that I want to ignore it. Tears well up in my eyes. I’m so pathetic.
“Let go, pup. I’ve got you. I’m not fucking going anywhere.”
“There we go,” he murmurs into my hair, a strain in his voice that mirrors my own desire. “Take whatever you need from me.” I want to drink his blood. For our two beings to become one. Instead, I bite down harder, willing his skin to break.
Asher’s lips skim my temple as he withdraws from me. I wince at the loss, ignoring the unease settling in the pit of my stomach.
He puts me down, albeit reluctantly, and pulls my shirt over my breasts after one last lingering look. Heat flares in his brown irises,
as he lifts his arm and places his fingers on his tongue, sucking off the remnants of me. My pussy throbs, my throat constric...
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Letting my eyes fall below his waist, I note the distinct outline of his erection, and I’m struck with the memory of rubbing myself on it and how he came from just that alone. A tremor ripples in my voice when I speak. “Do you…I mean, I can—” He glances down at his crotch and then gives me a small smirk. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll take care of myself while you’re off having fun with another man. It’ll help ...
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I continue staring at his lap. He steps forward, using his middle finger to tug my chin up. “Seriously, Luce. I didn’t do that just so you could reciprocate.” Releasing me, he moves back,
Once I’ve managed to taper my thoughts a bit, apprehension settles on my shoulders, weighing them down. Asher drags a hand through his hair, letting out a long breath, and I cross my arms over my chest to get a little distance from everything. My toe taps of its own accord. “What changed?”
Maybe I should learn not to overthink and just live in the moment, but the only time I’ve ever been able to shut my brain off long enough to do that is when I’m with him.
Taking a step toward me, Asher swoops in, gathering me into his arms once more.
kisses me again. This time, it’s slow, steady, and languid like we have all the time in the world, and I moan into the action, unable to help myself. “I was an idiot,” he tells me, his tongue flicking across my upper lip as he draws back. “That’s not an excuse or really a very good explanation, but it’s the truth.”
I…I know it might not seem like it, but I do intend to earn your forgiveness. No matter what I have to do. I won’t stop until—” The lights above us flicker, and he cuts off, tilting his
“Ghosts? Are you saying they’re behind this?” My eyebrow quirks, and I grab his head, pulling him away from my neck. “You don’t believe in ghosts, do you?”
“I’m not arrogant enough to think we’re totally alone on this planet. Besides, isn’t that what makes people human? The soul? Where do you think it goes when you die?”
“I have a date to get to, you know.” “Ah, yes. With that kid from the quad. Will you be telling him about your time with me, or should I walk you to the Lyceum and take care of that for you?” “I’m taking this one to the grave,” I whisper. “Oh good. In life and in death then.” I can feel his grin in my chest,
The used utility knife in my pants pocket is heavy against my thigh as I make my way back over to the pair, my fingers itching to drive the blade between his veneers. If we weren’t in public, I’d do it, no questions asked, just for the way he looks at her.
Her smooth, delicious throat that I’d love to sink my teeth into again,
