Kindle Notes & Highlights
fine, metal barbs
No comma
to have General Naylor removed before he got his platoon killed.
A platoon is usually commanded by a junior officer, not a general.
one of the ranger’s most notorious traitors
rangers'
some two-thousand miles
No hyphen.
“Sorry ladies but I need
Sorry, ladies,
“What’s the mission.”
?
nice, little old lady
No comma
Apart from guarding the city’s food and thera supplies,
Where is the city getting its food anyway, if there are monsters everywhere and apparently no farms?
He’d favored comfort and sensibility over fashion.
Sensibility is being sensitive, not sensible.
“Really Rowan,
Comma needed before term of address.
“Goodbye Auntie.
Comma needed before term of address.
She twisted her hair into a knot and stuffed in into the cap.
it into
look like an alien was about to birth from her brain.
They have (stories about) aliens?
Princess?” A tall, striking woman said
Dialog tag should not be punctuated as a separate sentence.
“Hello Murdoch.
Comma needed before term of address.
Augie Paddon I c—arry things.”
Paddon. I
Ode to Joy, a composition by an ancient composer
Interesting. We're post-apocalyptic?
Two brights spots of red
bright
Dale had fulfilled their promise when he recruited Murdoch as their camp cook.
when they recruited
“Doesn’t he know any other tune,”
?
“Valko you’re on watch.”
Comma needed after term of address.
“Elias get water for Noah.
Comma needed after term of address.
“Get the hell out of my way scribe.”
Comma needed before term of address.
The floating platforms were deserted..
One period, not two.
“Your order’s all ready.
Close "
from the keeper’s garage,
keepers'
It was only two-feet in length,
No hyphen between an adjective and the noun it modifies.
“Scout Andula and Striker Shannock make yourself ready!”
Comma needed after terms of address (before "make").
it wouldn’t set until well after midnight,
No. It doesn't matter how far north you are, midnight is (as the name says) the MIDDLE of the NIGHT. You know, the period of darkness. It's roughly halfway between sunset and sunrise. Sunset will never be after it.
“Ten minutes to stretch folks,”
Comma needed before term of address.
had barely taken the edge of her exhaustion
off
weigh over six-hundred pounds.
No hyphen.
“It’s pretty straight forward isn’t it?
straightforward,
dropped it five-hundred feet away.
No hyphen
their feet propped on crates of gear and weapons pointing into the Meadows.
I had to parse that sentence twice before I got it. A comma after "gear" would help with clarity, so that the reader doesn't think the crates contained both gear and weapons.
to shirk off his coat and quiver.
shrug off? Shirk off means to avoid working, which is clearly not what he's doing.
He stepped back and addressed them all “There’s
all.
“That’s scientist number twelve” Conall said.
twelve,"
“Are you okay?” Stupid question. Of course, he wasn’t okay.
No comma when the "of course" is simply agreeing with an earlier statement.
Empaths can do that right?
that, right?
What she really needed was a few hours sleep.
hours' [it's "an hour's sleep" not "an hour sleep"]
The resurgence happened nearly six-hundred years ago.
had happened nearly six hundred
“Orson leave us alone, please.
Comma after term of address
to fix the saints’ damned cat.
saints-damned
when they left this saints cursed oasis.
saints-cursed
hitching her quill of arrows
quiver
from the Abbott Archivist only.”
Abbot - Abbott is a surname, Abbot is a title
Why would Atherton send us to find the science team then.
?
What were the scientists studying.”
?
his face was like a harlequin’s—half
They still have harlequins?
