What Got You Here Won't Get You There: How Successful People Become Even More Successful

by Marshall Goldsmith

I use an irrefutable test with my clients to show how we all unknowingly encourage sucking up. I ask a group of leaders, “How many of you own a dog that you love?” Big smiles cross the executives’ faces as they wave their hands in the air. They beam as they tell me the names of their always-faithful hounds. Then we have a contest. I ask them, “At home, who gets most of your unabashed affection? Is it (a) your husband, wife or partner; (b) your kids; or (c) your dog?” More than 80 percent of the time, the winner is the dog. I then ask the executives if they love their dogs more than their family members. The answer is always a predictable but resounding no. My follow-up: “So why does the dog get most of your attention?” Their replies all sound the same: “The dog is always happy to see me.” “The dog never talks back.” “The dog gives me unconditional love, no matter what I do.” In other words, the dog is a suck-up. I can’t say that I am any better.