Leave Me Behind

by K.M. Moronova

“Are you upset because I didn’t show you affection both mornings after I fucke...

you think you’re anything other than a good looking, average soldier. I just used you for what I want...

“Stop dancing around the question, fuckface.” Don’t let his words get to you. I steel my mind the best I can.

“I don’t hate you.” I freeze, arm still partially raised for my next strike.

“I want to dominate you. I want to break you into a million pieces and make you answer only to me.

I want to keep you as far away from my squad as possible before I ruin what’s left of you. Because if you don’t leave, that’s what’s going to happen. I’ll break you, just like I break everything. Is that enough?

“Especially if it’s a person. Take away what he loves and you’ll break him irrevocably. You’re heartless, Gallows. That’s why I’m taking you under my wing. No one gets it quite like you and me.”

Jenkins grins. It’s one of his malicious ones that gives me chills. “We have snakes everywhere, Gallows. Trust no one.”

My eyes widen. “No one?”

“No one but me, love.” He

“Do you trust me?” I ask Jenkins.

“I’m not sure I ever will,” he says somberly. He lifts his hand to my chin and holds it

“You are a dangerous little thing. Beautiful, but dangerous.”

Before I fall asleep, I conclude that he is the beautiful, dangerous one. Wicked in his ways. Perhaps that’s why he holds me so securely while he sleeps with his head on my chest. We were made for each other—molded by darkness itself.

As long as I’m by his side, I will follow him to the grave.

She really is a beautiful, dangerous thing, just as Jenkins said she was.

A warning he gave us when he’d only just got her himself.

Eren worked with him often, but I only remember how much he spoke...

And for the first time since I lost Abrahm, I feel distinct fear enter my soul. I cannot let her die like he did. I will not survive it.

“Where to start… We first suspected foul play when Abrahm

was shot. The bullet he was hit with was unlike the rest in the raid. It was a bullet meant for Bones.”

“What kind of bullet?” I ask, brows pinching. A black one.

Eren stares at me for a beat before answering, “A black one.”

A black bullet. Everyone knows only Riøt used black bullets. My stomach twists with the...

“Then, targeted for a second time, when Bones was poisoned on the training field. We think it happened sometime after you hit him and everyone crowded around. There was an injection mark found on his arm.”

“I told you everything in the infirmary. She’s the insurance, Bradshaw.” I flinch at his tone. My eyes raise to Eren’s. They’re pleading. “Without her… I can’t keep you safe. You understand?”

“To be honest, no. Her record is gruesome and disturbing. It’s been flagged as odd that she was miraculously the only survivor of the mission failure two years ago. You seem to be awfully chummy with her, though.”

“Keep your enemies closer.” I see the logic,

“Kill her, Bones. I knew he’d set us up… He fucked me over. Kill her!”

“I have a secret to tell you.” I stroke her hair back. Bunny’s hands curl against my chest. I smile that she’s trying so hard to pretend to be sleeping.

He thought about the evil that grows in the human soul and he broke. In more ways than I could ever describe.” Bunny looks up at me. She

“He killed our aunt when we were twelve. He grew tired of her senseless beatings and decided to take care of it. Made

He wanted the world. He wanted power.

Eren read a lot of black market shit. He wanted to get involved with the underground dealers and sell weapons. It was a great gig for a few years. I became top of my platoon, and he rose to sergeant. But then we were caught red-handed by our general. At first we thought we were going

Something, at the time, we didn’t even know existed. We were such a lethal duo that we were placed with Malum immediately. And fuck, did we love every second of it. The dead bodies didn’t matter and neither did the terrible things that Eren’s underground operation allowed really, really bad people to do.”

“I’m telling you this because I care about you, Bun. I’m sick of lying. I don’t give a shit about your squad, but I wanted to tell you because I can’t lie for him anymore. Not when he wanted me to murder you.”

“You knew the whole time?” A dull ache ricochets in my chest.

“I had a suspicion after you joined our squad that the events were related.” It sounds stupid. I don’t blame her for glaring at me. Her head lowers. “Is there more?”

“There weren’t supposed to be any survivors. But you lived. Eren didn’t find out until a few months ago and he doesn’t like leaving anything unfinished.

So he made a few calls and had you recruited to Malum. General Nolan owed him a favor and he promised you’d be safe with us. Eren wanted to use you as insurance to protect me.”

“You two are the reason my squad is dead.” I face her, my blood hot. “No. I’m not. My brother maybe, but not me.”

“It was me. I shot him.” The blood leaves my head and all I can do is look at her. “I was aiming for you.”

“Who taught you to beg for death just because you were a device?” My eyes widen and my lips part.

“Nell… I know it wasn’t personal… I know you were just going through the motions.” He hiccups and reels back his emotions, tears still forming. “So why would I punish you? You’re just the weapon fired, not the evil that wields it.”

When I look at you, I feel like my thoughts are no longer blurry. This dark underworld I reign in doesn’t have to be the one I die in.”

He feels that way? My eyes lower and linger on his lips. Even after the things I’ve done.

“I want a world w...

“Together, our broken pieces can do anything.”

“All I want is to be by your side. In training, in war, in death. I can’t picture myself anymore without you being there, Bun.

You linger in my thoughts, in my fears. But mostly, you’re the cause of all the emotions I feel again. I was dead until you tripped on my foot on the plane.”