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“Fuck, it smells like you in here,” he groans.
“I just gotta make you come. Just once. Please let me,”
“Yes. Yes, that’s the idea.” “No, but, I just—ah—you said no sex. I’m not breaking that on night one.”
“Wh...
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“No … sex. Not this first night. Going to do this right.” “God, I don’t care. I just need—”
“I know, baby, shh.”
“I know. I need, too. I need you. Let’s … let’s just slow down one notch.”
“Are we stupid to do this? Is this a bad idea?”
“No, I don’t think so,” he whispers back. “We’re just us.”
But then I realize he’s just right. We’re what we are and what we’ve always been to each other. The alchemy of our bodies and the way my skin still remembers his is a part of that. He said it himself before: he’s altered my very DNA.
“Let me kiss you some more,”
“Let me take care of you. Please.”
“Fuck,” he whispers before he runs his lips back and forth across my nipple. “Fuck, I missed you.” The pure emotion in his voice sears through me.
“You gonna come like this?” he rasps, awed. “Can you get there with just my knee? Fuck, I bet you’re wet. If I touch you, I’m done. I’ll come in my pants like I’m sixteen again.”
“Yeah, you’re gonna come like this,”
“Yes. Make a fucking mess,” he says.
“I missed you, too,”
“So much.”
“Can I touch you?” I ask. “I’m a feather stroke away from coming already, Wren. I just wanted to—oof—what are you—shit.” His eyes roll back when I palm him through his jeans, and he grabs my wrist again. “No, honey. I’m serious. First time I get to be with you again, I would really like to make it last.”
“How do you think putting this off until tomorrow is gonna help?”
“Because I’m going to go back to my room now where I plan to masturbate furiously,”
“Can I at least watch?”
“Jesus Christ, you’re trying ...
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For all that I prioritized regular life responsibilities, structure, and plans, I have realized over the years how little room I left to make other plans, simply for fun. I recognize how that stuff fell onto you by default, and I’m sorry.
Thank you for kissing me tonight.
“It’s just too easy to fall right back into what we know is … good,”
“Good, huh?”
“If you want to use my body, I won’t hold it against you.”
“Think you’d have to hold something against me to get me off,”
“But.” I’ve got a brilliant idea. New rules. “What if we say we can’t do anyt...
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“Meaning, we couldn’t pull over and fuck in the back seat—” “Jesus, Byrd.”
“—but last night was the first time I came on your thigh.”
“We could get cr...
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“I have always appreciated your creative-thinking skills,”
Because I want to spread you wide on these pristine white sheets and taste you.
Because I hate that I lost you for half of a decade and I need this to be perfect more than I’ve ever needed anything, ever. I’m struggling not to grab you and kiss you and fuck you until we both forget the time we lost. Until we both forget our names.
Because you make up half of my soul. Because as desperate as I am to be near you, to be inside you, I’m terrified that having you this close again will also remind you of all the parts of me you wanted to leave.
“I missed that,”
“I missed making you laugh like that.”
“And how I missed making you feel anything. Turning you on, making you happy. Even missed annoying you.”
She’s mine and I’m hers, and all my life’s greatest happiness can be traced back to her, so I kiss her because I want to, and forget the rest.
So many of her scars are related to me.
“I’m just happy you came here with me,”
“Get it, baby,” I say, watching her come apart in bliss.
“No!” He rears back. “What if it’s still on my hands?”
And right then and there, it’s as if whatever piece of my heart I was trying to reserve is slingshot straight from my chest. The fact that he can stand there with his dick and eyeballs on fire, liquid streaking down his face from the corners of his eyes and his nostrils over his mustache, and still think of me …
He can have whatever he wants from me again. Ev...
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“I cannot believe I don’t get to watch you undress me right now.”
“I swear on everything. I swear on my life I wouldn’t ask, but I’m s-scared to touch it in case there’s anything left on my hands.”
I should consider hesitating. I don’t. I reach in and wet three fingers in the ice cream and carefully slide them along his flesh.
