Fearless (The Powerless Trilogy, #3)

by Lauren Roberts

In fact, when I’m not in the presence of Pae, I can likely be found emptying the contents of my stomach over the boat’s railing.

I smile for her, only her, always her.

My favorite color is a shade of her, a sliver of the vibrance she exudes. And I will gladly drown, gladly burn, gladly fall into those blue eyes until the day she looks at me for the last time.

“I promised to save your life again and again. And I will, whether you allow me to stay in it or not.”

I run a finger down my blade before flicking my eyes up to his. “It depends on whose blood.”

the people of Izram don’t possess powers. They depend on their own might, their own will. And I admire that far more than unearned strength.

Fear is power. And where there is power, there is something for him to wield.

“I think you know exactly who you want to be. Who you are.” His words are like a soft battle cry. “You’re the leader you always wanted for Ilya. You’re our Silver Savior.”

“She was my A.” My throat tightens. “Ava was my Adena. But they don’t go far.” I gently lift her arm until she’s pressing a palm to her beating heart. “Your A lives here now.”

“Death himself couldn’t drag me from you.”

in my experience, there is love. And there is duty. But there is never both.”

“There is love within duty, and duty within love. You can’t have one without the other, and yet”—she takes a deep breath, her gaze distant—“you can never truly have both. So choose, Kai Azer. The girl. Or power. And whether or not she is worth the destruction of everything you are.”

“Just practicing to survive. Like I always have.”

“Don’t fear power. Wield it. Perhaps even let it control you.”

“Being an Ordinary is not what makes you weak. It’s your heart.”

But for the first time, I’m witnessing Elites rendered completely powerless. I am rendered completely powerless.

“You forget, Kai.” Her fingers wrap tightly around the spear. “This is my Trial.”

“It seems you’ll make a fine queen.” The diamond on my finger grows heavy. “It’s as though you were born for this.”

“To the Ordinaries,” she says cheerily. “And every unjust death. May they be avenged.”

“Ruling is all about hiding. The truth, motive, yourself—all of it. And the earlier you learn that, the easier it will be for you in this castle.”

“Just like old times.” “Just like old times,” I echo. “I missed you, Brother.” Kitt sighs. “I miss us.”

“There is no shame in that when justified,” Ellie states. “It’s not knowing an end to your brutality that’s the problem.”

“I admire the rose and its thorns. Even the prettiest things can bite.”

the king killer, the queen-to-be, I was Paedyn Gray. And she is going home.

She was my A. But she was his Dena.

Hurt curls around my body, choking until it’s crushing my will, my hope, my heart. I grieve Adena all over again, because I was not the only one she lost. Two great loves were left behind, and both hug what remains of her close to their heart.

“Can I give you a hug, Mak?” He doesn’t do it for me. I can tell by the tensing of his shoulders. No, he does it for his Dena—my A.

We share a warm smile before swords are clashing between us.

“You’re supposed to dodge that, Kitt,” I say sympathetically.

“Yeah, well, I forgot. That’s why I’m the king, and you’re my Enforcer. I’m not good at fighting my own battles.”

Just know that if I could do it all over again, I would have run from that poppy field with you when we had the chance.

My duty may be to the king, but my heart, Pae, is wherever you are. It is in the palm of your hands, the pad of your thumb.

On paper, you really do sound like a poet. Or a fool. I won’t let you ruin yourself for me.

“You just wanted someone to blame for it.”

I hear strength where shame once was, fearlessness where I would once cower.

“Because you will never know real power. Yours was given. But mine…” I shake my head. “Mine was found.”

“Where’s your sword? I need to hit something.” A ray of sunshine, this one.

“I have never been so vicious. It was terrifying, this person I became. This darkness swelling within me. And worst of all”—she chokes—“it didn’t help.”

“I know, love.”

“After this,” he shouts, “I won’t get to call you Princess anymore.” His smile is bittersweet. “I’ll have to call you Queen.”

Not my friend. Not my betrothed. Just a king who ordered me to be his killer.

This is not an opponent. This is the boy who braids back my hair and dances for the both of us. The boy who would chase me to the ends of the earth if it meant he could hold me one more time. This is a man who would bury another for me—would bury himself, if only I asked.

I have never seen him without a soft spot for me. It seems today is that day. His desire for me to survive him seems to have erased all other sentiment he has for me.

It’s the Enforcer who stares down at me, not the Kai who counts my freckles. It’s the Deliverer of Death in this Pit, not the man who would hunt down anyone who dared hurt me.

His shadow falls over me, and terror grips the heart that once felt nothing but love for him. He is devastation dressed with the shell of devotion.

And for the first time in my life, I don’t fear Death. I fear him.

Fight back, Pae. I need you to fight back.

“Adena died here. I want to die here too.” Blood trickles from my ears, mingling with the tears racing down my face. “I couldn’t save her then. But I can save you now.”

He stills, tears gathering in his eyes. I reach slowly toward him, cutting off the curt shake of his head. My bloody hand rests gently atop his pounding chest. “Through the chest, remember?” A tear rolls down my cheek, carving a path through the sand sticking there. “That is how I want to die. Just like the ones I’ve loved.”

“You’re the Enforcer,” I manage weakly. “An Ordinary was never going to win this.”