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life falls apart; and maybe some things can’t be mended, but perhaps they can be reshaped into something even more beautiful.
Keep going, she says. Keep putting one foot in front of the other, just as I did. You’ve taken the first steps – now see where the path takes you.
‘Just put one foot in front of the other, again and again, slowly, slowly, along the path,’ Tashi tells me, and his words become a mantra that I repeat over and over in my head. One foot in front of the other, again and again, slowly, slowly.
Sometimes you just have to throw your heart into the river of life and dive in after it.
‘My mother often used to say that life is not about finding yourself – it’s about creating the person you want to be. Life doesn’t always give us answers. She taught me we have to accept there are some things we can’t understand, and in the end our lives will be defined by what we do with that fact – how we accept it and pick ourselves up, facing reality and adapting to it, rather than denying or ignoring it.
‘It’s never easy, making changes, is it? It takes quite a bit of work because, as we Buddhists know, the natural human way is to cling blindly to the desires and beliefs that make us suffer. Wishing life was otherwise keeps us stuck. Accepting where we are and focusing on finding the goodness in every day can go a long way to getting us out of that downward spiral of suffering.
‘If we can let go of the thoughts that are keeping us trapped, stop fighting with them and struggling against them, we will soar upwards, where the currents take us.’
‘You remember how Violet used to say you just have to keep putting one foot in front of the other, slowly, slowly, until you reach a place where you can see the sky beneath you again? Well, that’s what we did.’
‘Life is like that scree sometimes, isn’t it? It seems bleak and dead. But if you look really carefully, you’ll find little signs of life. Tiny, fragile plants, like this one, determined to push their way into the light. Determined to change the desolation into something else – a place where there is still hope and beauty.
‘Buddha say three kinds of people. First kind have mind like rock: thoughts are carved there, like on mani stones. Stay angry or sad or frightened a long time. Second kind have mind like sand: anger, sadness written there but pass away quickly as sand shifts. Third kind most pure and undisturbed: mind like water. Thoughts never can be written there, just flow through. Mind like water best. Let thoughts pass through. Doesn’t mean don’t be thinking them, just not holding on to them.’
‘Ah, Daisy, your heart isn’t breaking in a bad way. This time it’s breaking wide open, like a seed. And when that happens, there’s the possibility of a transformation, the birth of something new.’
That Violet always used to say life is not about finding yourself – it’s about creating the person you want to be.
