The Lies of Locke Lamora (Gentleman Bastard, #1)

by Scott Lynch

But I trust my points are noted,” said Jean. “Very noted,” said Locke. “Received, recognized, and duly considered with the utmost gravity. Sealed, notarized, and firmly imprinted upon my rational essence.” “Gods, you really are cheerful about this, aren’t you? You only play vocabulary games when you feel genuinely sunny about the world.”

hes so me

“NICE BIRD, asshole,” said Locke.

“An amusing plan. It has balls, and that appeals to me.

Oh locke

“Mmm.” Locke sipped hesitantly, then tilted the cup back and poured it down his throat in one smooth series of gulps. “Actually not bad at all. Tastes minty, very refreshing.”

Cut to the puking

“Someday, Locke Lamora,” he said, “someday, you’re going to fuck up so magnificently, so ambitiously, so overwhelmingly that the sky will light up and the moons will spin and the gods themselves will shit comets with glee. And I just hope I’m still around to see it.” “Oh, please,” said Locke. “It’ll never happen.”