solving. But real conversations are rarely so neatly ordered. They tend to jump around, and that’s okay. The order in which you use the skills is less important than that you use them. All the listening in the world can’t make up for failing to assert the one issue that matters to you, and there’s nothing you can assert that will make up for failing to listen to what really matters to them. And if there are problems to be solved, but you put them off, the glow of understanding will soon fade, and you’ll wonder what all that talking actually accomplished.
