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My first funeral is for a Calloway. Not my mom. Not my dad. A fucking Calloway.
My family stole that kind of joy from them the instant they assaulted Lily and kidnapped Luna, and if I could give back what they took, I would. I’m trying. I’ve been trying.
“You have your mom’s heart.” “Dad.” “That’s a good thing. Keep it. You don’t want mine. It’s ugly.” “It’s not,” Maximoff refutes. “That’s exactly what she’d say.” He smiles at him.
“He better not,” Farrow says, slipping a protective look at the door. It’s reassuring knowing that Farrow will throw himself in front of Donnelly if need be. I imagine Donnelly standing opposite my dad and maybe even my brother. It’s a sad picture, and my heart pangs.
Farrow adds, “It’s not like I was an over-sharer.” His face tenses while chewing on a piece of gum. “I could’ve told you or anyone else how much I love that shameless motherfucker—that he’s been my family. But I never even came close to that.”
“You make sense together,” Farrow says. “You’ve likely always made sense since you first met him, but I didn’t really see it until later.”
The one thing Donnelly is careful with is you.”
“I would’ve wanted to.”
“No,” he cuts in, his eyes glassing but he fights away the rise of emotion. “If you offered, it would’ve been harder not to pick you.”
“He’s done enough.” That’s not Farrow. It’s my dad. He’s standing in the doorway, Moffy beside him, and he tells Kinney, “Put down the pitchforks.” “Dad.” “He’s done enough,” Dad says so severely
“Luna’s dad,” he corrects, then shakes his head at me, like I’ve chosen to fall in love with the most grating specimen on planet Earth. On the contrary, Donnelly is the most mesmerizing earthling I’ve met thus far.
“I don’t have a pickup truck, Luna’s dad.” “I’ll put you in one.” “Now you’re buying me a car?” Farrow bursts out laughing which makes me smile, especially as Baby Ripley giggles, and even my dad can’t hide the rise of his lips.
“Come on in, space babe.”
Beckett struggles for the words, before he admits, “I chose drugs over him.”
“Donnelly might not have told me about you,” Beckett says to me, “but I doubt it’s because you meant nothing to him. I think it’s likely because you meant the most, and I know…the deeper things were always harder for him to share. It was like if he did, they were more at risk of being taken, and I can’t fault him for keeping what he loved close. I’m really in no place to fault him for anything.” He glances to Charlie. “And you shouldn’t either.” Charlie nods a few times.
“He loves every version of me, and I love being with him, Dad. I love how he loves me completely. I love how uninhibited and mighty I feel when I’m with him.
“I don’t like how Lily—your mom—felt like she couldn’t tell me about what happened. I don’t like how you felt like you couldn’t go back to your room because I was spying. I don’t like the person I’m close to becoming…or maybe, I’m already him.” He stares off at the bookshelf behind me.
“You’re my dad, and I don’t want that to change with time.”
“Okay. I’ll ask your boyfriend.” My lips part in gut-punching shock. Did I just transport myself to an alternate universe? Is this real? “Did you just call him my…?” “Is that not what he is to you?” he asks. Tears invade my eyes, and I blink, the waterworks cascading down my face. I rub my cheeks fast and spring to my feet. In seconds, I’m hugging my dad, and his arms are wrapping around me. The beat of my heart begins to slow.
And the Luna before the amnesia needs you around if she comes back.” She’s all one Luna to me. One girl to love over and over and over again.
“But I’m always expecting the rug to be pulled out from under me, and it’s bad enough you’re standing on it now too.”
Moffy exhales, then turns on Charlie. “You’re going to fight for CEO.” “Go ahead, say it like a statement and not a question,” Charlie says in a bored tone. “We’re not begging you,” Jane chimes in. “But if Ben and Eliot choose to go through this selection process, it’d be nice if one of us was there.”
“I can take it,” I say. “I don’t have much going on career-wise.” “And just like that, my name is in the ring,” Charlie says dryly, then he looks right at Maximoff. “You’re welcome.” “Thank you,” he says deeply. And I realize I’ve been anxious about their relationship for nothing. Moffy isn’t jealous or hurt that Charlie is looking out for me—he wants him to.
Some things never change, since I’ve never seen Uncle Connor be festive. His cardboard variant is usually decorated with more Christmas cheer.
I’ve known that my childhood home used to belong to my aunts and uncles too, and then gradually, they moved out and raised their families in houses down the street.
And Connor…” His face twists at a thought. “I’m really sorry your mom took that shit from you. If you had even a semblance of it growing up, you would realize how special it is. Don’t take that away from Jane.”
That’s all he says, but like Jane and Moffy, he also never ruined it for the rest of us.
And I’m pro-Luna. Whatever she wants to do in life, I’m here for. Within reason. I’m not gonna pass her a needle to shoot up.
“They’ll want Charlie. I think it’s pretty much guaranteed. He’s the most qualified after Moffy and Jane, and they bowed out.”
I owe him. I don’t want to be indebted to anyone, let alone a guy eight years younger than me. What the fuck am I doing? No control. I had no control.
“I hate putting people out.” I speak hushed. “Just as much as I dislike causing them any sort of grief. This. My sleep issues. I hate that it affected someone else. I wish I could control it.”
love you.” He loves me. “I’m not going far.” He’ll be back. He kisses me.
Farrow is standing three car lengths away. Far enough that the gap should feel infinite and cold, but the space between us has never felt cavernous. It’s felt like he’s always been right there, beside me. I breathe easier. “Luna told you?” I ask. “Yeah, she told me.” I almost smile, thinking of Luna going to Farrow. I like that she recognizes I’m not alone in this world either.
“Merry Christmas, you blue-eyed shameless motherfucker.” I grin. “Merry Christmas, Dr. Kale.” “Hale.” “Right. Maximoff Hale’s main man.” “Only man,” Farrow corrects and flips me off.
“Fuck, I love that girl.” We’re both smiling as we step inside.
But this… This is what Farrow found. What I thought I’d never have.
I want this. I want this to last. I hope, and hope, and hope.
I snap a photo of Xander mid-chewing. He almost smiles. “If it’s not gross, delete it,” he says with a mouthful.
Xander and I are smiling because that’s our brother. The rising star of the Hales. The one person who we can point to and say, We’re not all fuck ups. See. Except the world will try to claim he’s not one of us. He’s a Meadows. That must be why he’s so different. So much more athletic. So much more skilled.
“You’re by far the strongest person I’ve ever known. Maybe stronger than Moffy. It makes me feel like I can be too.”
“Yeah, I guess I want to prove that Hales aren’t people that can be easily walked all over, and we’re not that dumb. Plus, I get to spend more time with you. And a secondary perk, I’m pretty sure Charlie will take this home, so we don’t have to be afraid we’ll actually be imprisoned in that corporate hellhole for eternity, even if we go hard for it.”
I’m friends with Farrow, but our interactions rarely involve both Donnelly and Oscar. To Farrow, I’ve mostly been “Maximoff’s sister” rather than “Donnelly’s girlfriend”—new titles, new feelings.
Anyone who makes my girlfriend feel like shit is an enemy to me. Facts.
I haven’t been ousted yet by my client. In fact, every morning, he asks, “You still okay with coming in?” I always reply, “Would rather be in than out.”
It’s an understood agreement among all forces that Vada might not have a 24/7 bodyguard, but she belongs to all of us. We equally look out for her when she’s around.
Xander’s face has twisted in confusion. “It’s just paint. Jeez, you’re acting like she murdered another student.” I almost smile. That’s my elf.
My whole attention is on one guy. Because this is my job. Because he needs me.
It’s all I can do to walk ahead of him and clear a path to his next class. He’s at the point where he doesn’t even give a shit that people see him gripping the back of my shirt like a little kid fearing getting separated from their parent at a carnival. He’s just holding on. And I can’t get fucking distracted if I’m the person he’s holding on to.
“Girl, you keep doing this to me,” I say in one breath. “What?” “Making me fall in love with you.” I’m still choked. Don’t know how I managed to say it at all, but I clear the ball out of my throat. “Don’t stop.” Very softly, she says, “I never will.”
Beckett smiles a little, staring out at New York. “You don’t even know how good you are.” His eyes, full of emotion, meet mine again. “I was lucky to have you as a friend. Every day. And I took it for granted. Because when I lost it, it felt like my world went dark.”
