You ask Mary to do something in a new way. Nothing happens. You ask again. She budges an inch. You put pressure on her. Maybe you get two inches. You become furious at Mary, making all sorts of unkind inferences about her character and motivation. But the main problem is that, just like the chair and sofa, a dozen different forces are holding Mary’s behavior in place. In her case, instead of ropes and cables and rubber bands you find supervisors, organizational structures, performance appraisal systems, personal habits, cultures, peer relationships, and (most important) an ongoing stream of
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