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just… I just want to be deeply, wholly, completely in love without the law needing to make it real. That’s not my reality,
And it’s not because he wouldn’t make the perfect husband. It’s simply because I’m not interested in being a wife. Not anymore. Him being my partner in life doesn’t mean we have to do anything more than love one another and create the safest space to be exactly who we are.
We were black men, continuing to thrive in a system that was built to destroy us. Each meeting was monumental.
I’ll teach him how it feels to be disarmed and shot in the leg with his own shit so that he can think about the mistake he made every time it rains.”
He’d slid into home base, right where I wanted him. Right where I needed him. Right where he was supposed to be.
“Ahhhhh!” I squealed, quickly determining I was completely and utterly obsessed with the man who had turned me every way but loose well into the morning hours.
Take your time. Feel it. Slow, baby. Let it build. Just like that. Coaching me through my orgasms while refusing to let me climb to my peak too soon or feel too much at once was menace behavior. Mercer’s sexual nature was becoming one of my favorite attributes.
He could either shut the fuck up and watch Pretty leave with a nigga that meant her well, or he could shut the fuck up and watch Pretty leave with a nigga that meant her well. The third option was for him to watch her walk away with a pistol shoved in his mouth if he couldn’t shut the fuck up. It was simple.
She wept like a woman who had lost everything. She wept like an exhausted mother. She wept like a lost child. She wept like a patient in pain. She wept like she’d been waiting for this day all her life.
“There’s something about when Black women unite. We can move mountains. We’re no strangers to solutions. It’s the most beautiful, unfiltered experience ever, witnessing Black women laugh loudly and step fully into who we are as we dine, sip, and converse. We heal one another. As much as I like my quiet, I love our energy. Right now, it’s what I need to push through this moment.”
He left me there, shaking his head as if he was growing sick of my antics already. If so, then he needed to get it together because he had a lifetime to put up with me. I was his problem now, and I took pride in that.
I shuddered. It was a shame, the hold Captain had me in. When he was around, I was never well. I was always a sniff or kiss away from buckling knees and breathless fainting.
“You are the occasion, Pretty. You should wake up to them every day, and I’ma make sure you do from this day forward.”
“It’s not just that I love you. That’s putting this shit mildly. I’m in love with you. I’m indebted to you. I’m invested in you. I’m interested in you, your dreams, your wants, your needs, your hurt, your pain, your happiness, your well-being, your health, your ever… your everything. “And with every second, I’m increasingly in awe of the woman you are, the strength that you have, and all that you’ve achieved while remaining truest to who you are. You’re a fucking gem, baby. Nothing or no one can make me believe anything differently.
Even in the next lifetime, I wanted Mercer as my own. He was too fucking addictive. It didn’t matter how, but I would make it my business to find him time and time again.
I snuggled up against him. My eyes closed involuntarily. He was my peace bringer.
“If death comes for me tonight, girl. I want you to know that I love you.”
