There Is No Ethan: How Three Women Caught America's Biggest Catfish

by Anna Akbari

It was his cleverness, his openness, and perhaps most of all, his eagerness to keep the conversation going that swept me off my digital feet.

Studies have shown that we are partial to certain names based on our own personal associations, and those influences shape how we see and connect with a person.

Changing how and what we present can alter the reality of our lives and our connections.

He was manipulating me by preying on my insecurities in an effort to diminish his own bad behavior.

The unfair judgments killed my confidence. Those were the moments when I questioned if any of this was worth it.

It was too late to turn back now. Insatiable curiosity and a nagging what-if got the best of me.

I couldn’t say if my need to meet the “real” Ethan was motivated more by some lingering hope that he was the man he’d presented himself to be or simply an obsession with knowing the truth. It was probably equally both.

Ethan was skilled at pressing just the right buttons and displaying the perfect amount of vulnerability to somehow stop otherwise rational people from behaving normally.

“I can’t lie, can’t keep things from the people in my life, can’t deceive. I don’t have the face for it. If something happens with a woman, I’ll come and tell you very quickly. You won’t have to guess at it. You won’t have to piece things together or do detective work,” he assured her.

None of us had actually talked on the phone with Ethan or met him in person, and yet we all felt emotionally tied to him.

Determining which details were real and which were fake was going to be a challenge.

Why would this accomplished woman torture other women?

An article would also ensure that Ethan Schuman was forever googleable—and always linked to Emily.

Emily’s message felt like the kind of stock response one receives from a large corporation after filing a customer service complaint: We’re sorry, we promise to do better, thanks for sticking with us.

What happens when real life becomes fiction, only to eventually manifest into some same-but-different reality years later?

The best liars hide their lies in truths.

The promise of the modern, technologically mediated age is the chance at an alternative existence.