The Fishermen (Infidelity #2)

by C.P. Harris

Nothing about Leland’s situation was sexy to me. Not his pain nor the bruises I hadn’t inflicted with my own tongue, hands, and teeth. I could have lost him.

“God, Leland. If I could slam you against that wall and take you right now, I would. I would fuck you for all the years I hadn’t been able to. For all the years I loved you and wasted that love on my pain. I would fuck you until you couldn’t see straight.”

“This is for you, Leland,” I whispered, holding on to my erection. “This is because of you.”

“What’s that?” he asked, lifting one end of my now transparent tank when I bent to help him up.

“It’s a daisy,” I said as his fingers brushed along the tattoo taking over my flank, making me shiver. “You have one too.”

“What’s your story?” he asked.

“One lonely night stroll home from Cole’s place,” I said, “I came across a tattoo shop with flowers in the window. Seemed serendipitous. Do I even want to know your story?”

“I just…needed something to hold on to that night. Something to help remind me that I could be more.”

“You are more,” I said. “You’re everything, Leland.”

“What were you doing in the middle of on-coming traffic, Leland?”

“Resisting the urge to run back to you,”

“I hope this taught you to never resist. Open up,”

“You have the painting I made for you hanging in your bedroom,” he said, accepting another helping of soup.

“His Storm,” I said, voicing the title of it.

“They’ll eventually see it. What will you say when they ask why my watermark is on it?”

“I’ll tell them the truth.”

“Whic...

“That the man I love created it for me. That it depicts the passion we once shared. The ...

“You say you love me,” he whispered. “But I don’t even know you anymore.”

“Brown is still my favorite color. Specifically the shade of brown that shines like burnished honey in the sunlight. Like now,” I said as the afternoon sun shone through the kitchen window to light up his honey-gold eyes. “I no longer prefer to work by the water. It distracts me, slows me down because I’m constantly drawn to it, and the view causes me to get lost in my thoughts. I prefer to get my work done first and then reward myself by taking a stroll along the river.”

“With a bottle of...

“Yes, because some things will never change,”

“I’m still capable of being jealous of anyone who thinks they have a claim on you,

I told myself that, one day, our half hearts would meet in the middle. One day, our hearts would join and be whole.

“I was your first,” I started. “It shouldn’t mean that much to me, but it does. It did. And you were so fucked-up for so long that I assumed I’d be your last too. I thought it would be impossible for you to feel your way through the dark to someone else, especially when I was right there in the dark with you. Waiting for you. Why didn’t you just say the right things to make us better? Why didn’t you come to me?”

“I was depressed, Leland. I thought I was doing the right thing by everyone. I had it wrong, and I’m so sorry.”

“Did it mean something to you? Did they mean something to you? Did you…enjoy it?”

“Never. And I always regretted it afterward.”

“Do you promise?” I asked, needing him to swear it. Needing to know that no one had satisfied him, because no one els...

“I swea...

“I kneel for no one but you, Leland. No one.”

“If you want me to claim you, Leland, just say the word,” Franky had said. I’d wanted to say the word. I’d wanted to say the word in every damn language and dialect known to man, even the ones that had long gone extinct. But I’d chosen the language of silence instead.

“Believe me,” he said, “I see exactly what’s in front of me. Everything else, including Lucas, is merely background noise.”

“You know, for someone whose knees are shredded, you sure have spent a lot of time on them this week,” I said.

“Keep it up,” he threatened. “I’m keeping score, you know.”

“The truth is, I saw it as proof that I was wanted. That I was worthy, and special, and so goddamned irresistible that everyone would want to risk it all to have me. For a moment, someone wanted me more than they wanted their next breath. In my mind it made you wrong for not wanting me. It made everyone who ever mattered wrong for not wanting me. And some part of me also relished in causing harm, because I felt harmed.”

“What brings you all the way out here when you’ve got a perfectly toxic river closer to home?”

“I think you know,” he said, stopping to gaze down at me.

“The Seattle state fair,” I said.

“This place reminds me of the day we became friends,” he said. “I come here and life suddenly feels simple. Easy. Like it was between us that day.”

“I get on that,” he said, pointing to the Ferris wheel straight ahead.

“The Ferris wheel?”

“Keeps me focused on my goal,” he said. “Keeps me focused on you.”

“We almost shit our pants up there,” I said, my voice a bit breathy from his intensity.

“Care to do it...

He held his hand out to me when I stayed quiet with indecision, because things were less scary when holding hands, even if that thing was revisiting the era when my fee...

“Shitting my pants has never sounded so good,” I said, closing...

“It never gets easier,” Franky said. “But it’s always worth it in the end.”

“Shall we pretend?” he asked, and I cocked a confused brow at him. “I still remember every word.”

I got it then. He wanted to recreate our first ride on the Ferris wheel. “I remember too,” I confessed.