Service Model

by Adrian Tchaikovsky

And really, Master did so little when alive that being dead should barely make a ripple in his schedule.

Charles found this unreasonable. When one of the kitchen domestics had begun breaking plates, it had only been on the third breakage that the unit had been retired as unfit for purpose. Given the considerable investment in domestic service that Charles represented, surely he should be allowed to murder three, or even five people before being deemed irreparably unfit for service.

Perhaps I could be employed at a more murder-tolerant manor.

All human officials of Grade Eight or above have been retired for reasons of departmental streamlining and efficiency.

If Uncharles could have turned his disdain metre to eleven he would have.

Uncharles considered this. “I would have to hope that I only murder an acceptably small number of my employers,” he concluded.