Games of Venus: An Anthology of Greek and Roman Erotic Verse from Sappho to Ovid

by Peter Bing

Perhaps the general cultural etiquette regarding homosexual relationships can shed some light on the problem. As we noted in the first part of this introduction, it was not considered proper for the boy (eromenos)to initiate a relationship with a man (erastes). There is, of course, the example in Plato's Symposium where Alcibiades—though the younger, and by all rights the one who should have been wooed—takes it on himself to court Socrates. But this example only proves the rule. For Alcibiades is himself aware of the peculiarity of his action and how it inverts the normal procedure, causing him to woo the much older Socrates as though he (Socrates) were the paidika (217b, literally “boy-things,” though used to denote the beloved). There is doubtless a deliberate and comic incongruity between Alcibiades’ previous characterization of Socrates as a Silenos (a hoary old satyr, 216d) and that here as a “boy-thing.”

the suggestive parallels from other poems and the lack of a corresponding kind of utterance representing the rejection of a boy's first come-on—

Because, as we know from many classical sources, exile was a regular and recommended way of getting over a failed love affair.

The speaker, whom we shall call Tibullus (at 1.9.83—in a poem not included in our anthology—when referring to the same amorous triangle, he names himself), is in love with a boy, Marathus (as revealed at 1.4.81–84). Marathus, on the other hand, cruel to Tibullus (cf. 1.8.81), is in love with Pholoe.

So Tibullus goes with Marathus, as a kind of spokesman, to persuade Pholoe to receive the boy.

“Don't be so proud,” he says to Pholoe, “because it will boomerang. Just look at Marathus here, who used to be so cruel [to me] and now realizes his mistake [don't you, Marathus?!].” This poem, then, contains at least four different speeches: “Admit it, you're in love” (1–26); “Girl, make love to the boy” (27–66, 69–78); “Girl, don't be cruel” (55–66: Marathus’ lament, quoted by Tibullus); and, “Boy, make love with me!”

He wants the straight truth, no exaggerations (3–4) and implicitly threatens Lygdamus with some form of punishment if he is not completely accurate in his account.

In the present moment of the discourse, the speaker is addressing his penis.69 Now, he says, it has sprung to life again (67–68), and he addresses it directly at vv.69ff. But then, when the dramatic situation seems clear (he's dressing down his penis for its slump) we learn just what the girl said to him when she realized that he was utterly incapable of making love to her:

She says basically: “either: (a) you've been bewitched; or (b) you've just been with someone else and have spent all your strength there.”

Why should I wail that chanting has hurt you, or herbs? Beauty needs no magic aids.

What hurts is to have touched the body, to have given long kisses, to have tangled thigh with thigh. (Tib. 1.8.23–26)

In a word, Amores 3.7 may be read as a defense, logically directed by the speaker to the girl, explaining to her that he has merely had a bad day, may be getting old, and at any rate has probably, as she (ironically) suggested, been bewitched.

So we know, at least in part, what his motive is; and, indeed, typical elements of a wooing speech are present: 1) vocative [plus praise of deceased mother]73 (7–8) 2) praise of amorous activities (9–10) 3) willingness to be ruled by her (10–13) 4) request [metaphorically stated, and including an imperative] (14–16)

If we are correct, these poems are not unlike puzzles or riddles. That is, they should be read for enjoyment as an aesthetic game.

The designer of each game has left the audience clues with which to reconstruct a more or less elaborated dramatic situation, identify the speaker(s) and the addressee(s), over-hearer(s), etc., and try to gauge the intent of the actors and the nature of the action which their utterances are part of, perform, or represent. This is one of many pleasures these poems were meant to offer, and by no means the fullest one. But it is a fundamental aspect of the game, which must be handled well for the rest to make sense. To take an analogy from music, the speech-action, like the bass line, tends to reveal the harmonic structure of the melody it supports. One ought, as Brahms said of the bass line, to look for it first. But it is not to be mistaken for the full pleasure of the music. Sometimes we have enough information to form a relatively clear idea of the intended scene and action; sometimes the words seem to suggest more than we can logically infer. But our inference must be guided in part by a familiarity with amorous practice, both word and deed.79

This section is much indebted to the pioneering work of many fine scholars, and does not pretend to originality. Among the many works that have appeared on the topic of ancient Greek sexual mores, we single out K.J. Dover, “Classical Greek Attitudes to Sexual Behaviour,” Arethusa 6 (1973) 59–73; idem, Greek Popular Morality in the Time of Plato and Aristotle (Berkeley 1974) esp. 205–216; idem, Greek Homosexuality (New York 1978); M. Foucault, The Use of Pleasure: The History of Sexuality vol.2 (New York 1985); J. Henderson, “Greek Attitudes toward Sex,” in Civilization of the Ancient Mediterranean, eds. M. Grant and R. Kitzinger (New York 1988) vol.2 pp. 1249–1263; D. Halperin, One Hundred Years of Homosexuality (New York 1989); J. Winkler, The Constraints of Desire (New York 1989); for the latter two cf. J. Griffin's sceptical review in The New York Review of Books 37.5 (1990) 6–12; D. Halperin, J. Winkler, F. Zeitlin, eds., Before Sexuality (Princeton 1990). For the erotic tradition in the visual arts, see J. Boardman and E. La Rocca, Eros in Greece (London 1978); D. Mountfield, Greek and Roman Erotica (New York 1982); C. Johns, Sex or Symbol: Erotic Images of Greece and Rome (Austin 1982); A. Dierichs, “Erotik in der Kunst Griechenlands,” Antike Welt 19 (Sondernummer 1988).

Homosexuality in Greek Myth

The physical ideal—observable in vase-painting and sculpture—is summed up in Aristophanes’ Clouds (vv. 1012–1014): “a smooth chest, shining skin, large shoulders, a small tongue, a big ass and a tiny cock.”

For an excellent discussion of the evidence from vase-paintings, cf. the sections on “Courtship and Copulation” and “Dominant and Subordinate Roles” in Dover (1978) 91–109.

“Lesbius” (the masculine form of “Lesbia”) who is pulcher (“handsome”).

Richlin's appendix on “The Circumstances of Male Homosexuality in Roman Society of the Late Republic and Early Empire” in The Garden of Priapus: Sexuality and Aggression in Roman Humor

What is life, what is joy, without golden Aphrodite? May I die when these things no longer move me, a secret love, soothing gifts, the bed, those tempting flowers of youth there to be plucked by men and women. But when agonizing age sets in, making repulsive even a handsome man, then constant anxious cares afflict his mind, he takes no joy in seeing the shafts of the sun, but is loathsome to boys, despised by women. What a pain the god made age.

Suddenly an immense sweat streams down my skin, and I tremble, seeing the blossom of youth, its beauty and joy. If only it lasted longer, but it is shortlived like a dream, youth which I adore. Heavy, formless age suddenly hangs overhead, loathsome and despised, making a man unrecognizable, and, poured about his eyes and brain, it mangles them.

what did I most want to happen to me in my raging heart. “Whom shall I sweet talk this time and lead back to your love? Who, Sappho, is doing you wrong?

For if she runs, she'll soon be chasing; if she won't take gifts, well, she'll give them; and if she doesn't love, soon she will love— even unwilling.”3

Come to me now once more, and free me from jagged sorrow, and make what my heart is longing for, happen. Y...

Then, Kypris, take this garland, and into our golden cups pour nectar mingled lusciously with merriment.

I'd rather see her comely step, the shining luster of her face than the Lydians’ chariots and infantry in armor.7

He seems to me the equal of the gods, that man, who sits with you face to face and, near you, listens closely to your lilting voice, your tempting laugh, which sets my heart a-flutter in my breast. For when I see you even a moment, I can't speak any longer,

but my tongue goes mute ...., a sudden, slender flame invades my flesh, my eyes go dark, my ears are roaring, cold sweat covers me, a trembling seizes all my body, paler than grass am I, and little short of dead I seem to myself

I yearn and go searching

Eros shakes up my heart like a mountain wind smashing into oaks

you came, and I was looking for you and you cooled my breast aflame with lust.

and on plush beds the supple .... you'd satisfy your longing for......

and there was no.....nor any shrine......... where we didn't go, no sacred grove.[....]no dance ]rattling

As the sweet-apple reddens on the top-most branch, the very tip of the top-most, and the apple pickers had forgotten it; no, not forgotten; they couldn't reach it.11

But since you are my friend, take the bed of someone younger. For I couldn't bear to live with you if I were the elder.

for me, neither the honey nor the bee14

The moon has set and the Pleiades, it's midnight, the hours go by. I sleep alone.

Sparrows were especially associated with Aphrodite because of their proverbial wantonness, and their eggs were eaten as aphrodisiacs,

“Sparrow,” moreover, was slang for the penis,

facet of female homosexuality in Greece that distinguishes it from its male counterpart, and from most heterosexual love in the Archaic and Classical periods: namely the expectation that either partner can be the pursuer or the pursued in a relationship, and that desire will be reciprocal. Male homosexuality, as one may observe it e.g. in the elegies of Theognis, adheres to a strict hierarchy in which the older male (the erastes) is always the pursuer, a youth (the eromenos) always the pursued. And while the youth inspires passion in the older male, the reverse is not the case—nor was it considered proper, since for the youth to allow himself to feel such desires was considered womanly.

This fragment apparently refers to the relationship between Sappho's brother, Charaxus, and the hetaira Doricha. According to Herodotus (2.135), Sappho roundly abused her brother, on his return from Egypt (where Doricha had taken up residence), for his affair with her, evidently because he had been cheated by her out of a large sum of money. Athenaeus (13.596ab) says that Sappho reviled Doricha in her poetry. In any event, here the poetess asks Aphrodite to make sure the pair doesn't get back together.

the men with bronze shields, sons of the Achaeans, among whom the greatest man with a spear was swift-footed Achilleus and Telamonian Aias, huge and valiant ...... .......the most beautiful]from Argos ......... Kyanippos]to Ilium

as thrice-cleaned gold's like brass— so alluring was his form. And along with them, from now on you, Polycrates, shall have the imperishable fame for beauty proper to song and to my fame.

While this lengthy fragment consists mostly of a catalogue of martial themes from the Trojan war, the speaker insists that he does not really want to deal with these (v. 10ff.). They function rather as foil to the central point, which comes only at the poem's culmination: praise for the good looks of a certain Polykrates (perhaps the tyrant), whose physical beauty is put on a par with the most beautiful heroes at Troy, including Troilos.

I don't kiss the guy1 who guzzles wine beside the brimming bowl and talks battles and tearful war, but the one who mingles dazzling gifts of the Muses and Aphrodite singing of lusty play.

O lord, with whom Eros the subduer and the dark-eyed nymphs and glistening Aphrodite join in play, you who roam the high crests of the mountains, I kneel and beg you, come to me kindly, hear my prayer, and may it please you: Give wise counsel to Kleoboulos, get him, Dionysus, to accept my love.

For Kleoboulos I yearn, of Kleoboulos I rave, at Kleoboulos I gaze.

Boy with the girlish glance I pursue you, but you won't listen, you don't know that you hold the reins of my soul.