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“I don’t know how to live without you.” And I shake my head quickly as tears pool. “And I don’t want to know how. I don’t want to find out.”
Someone named Mason convinced a freshman to screw each guy on the soccer team. One after the other. I didn’t have to be told it was her. I just knew.
BRUHHHH that’s so fucked up 😭😭😭😭
“My twenty-two-year-old brother is flirting, apparently not deliberately—I’m not even sure how that fucking happens—with your sixteen-year-old sister.” He waits for it to sink in. “Shit.”
🥴🥴🥴🥴
“Because I think she loves you more than she loves sex. And you love her more than you love alcohol, but you two just haven’t let yourselves believe it yet.”
“For tarnishing the Fizzle name? For bringing you up with cash and luxury?” He keeps shaking his head. “You and Lo have it so warped. You think you’re indebted to your parents because they gave you everything you have. But they didn’t give you what fucking mattered. They owe you. They owe you for not asking why their daughter isn’t home. Why she looks distant and sad. Why she has barricaded herself in a fucking apartment with her boyfriend. They have failed you, and if they tell you to get on a fucking plane or go to rehab—where we all know you shouldn’t be—then you need to tell them to go to
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hell yeah
But I haven’t spoken to her since my meeting with the lawyers. I’m not allowed to see her. I have a new psychiatrist now. Dr. Oliver Evans. I’ll meet him next week.
now why do i feel like he’s going to be perverted and evil
“I’ll keep that in mind,” she says shortly. “Anything else?” Fuck you. I can’t say it though. I don’t really feel it. More like, Fuck me. For being so stupid. For thinking you’d care.
😭😭😭😭😭
His eyes drop to my thighs. “It would have been easier if you wore a dress or skirt, but I think you can manage.” My heart bangs against my ribcage. Maybe I heard him wrong. “I want you to masturbate. You’ll be shocked until your brain responds to the negative stimuli.”
FUCKING KNEW HE’D DO THIS SHIT IM SICKKKK
I close my eyes and let that sink in. She doesn’t have to say, I love you because… The sentiment is attached to each and every word. She loves me because she believes I’m strong. She loves me because she’s a part of me. She loves me because I’ve become a better man through all of this.
WAAAAHHHHHH
She is my past, my present, my future. So when I open the door and slide into the driver’s seat, I’m not surprised that it feels like I’m returning home.
