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One of our deepest unconscious patterns is the false belief that we already know ourselves well enough to understand why we think, feel, and act the way we do. I will argue that, in fact, we don’t; and that thinking we do know who we are is part of the problem.
Perhaps it’s more accurate to say that our habits are the show.
Our work, therefore, is to learn to pay attention more consistently to what is actually happening in our lives.
child who feels constant pressure to “be good” may develop coping strategies that help her to be “perfect,” thereby avoiding criticism or punishment.
Another child with a different set of outside influences and inner factors may protect himself from threats by developing a strategy of hiding his vulnerability, finding ways to exert control, and seeming to be fearless.
“What am I paying attention to and why?”—allow
“what, why, and how” of your thoughts, feelings, and actions, instead of just taking them all for granted.
Studying your own thinking, feeling, or doing in the present moment without judgment becomes your chosen “object of attention,” rather than allowing your mind to continue being preoccupied with its usual reactive, habitual patterns.
This mindfulness activity is an exercise in becoming more conscious to what is going on inside you and remembering to be more purposeful in tuning in to yourself more often. As with repetition in physical exercise, the “attentional muscle” strengthens through a consistent effort to notice where your attention goes and then shift it back to a focus you have chosen consciously.
The Enneagram describes three “centers of intelligence,” nine personality “types,” and twenty-seven “subtypes” that provide an amazingly accurate picture of personality in terms of the patterns associated with the way we function.
are. As in Western psychology, the Enneagram views the personality as a “false self” that develops to allow your (vulnerable and young) “true self” to adapt, fit in, and survive among other humans. This perspective holds that personality is a “defensive” or a “compensatory” self whose coping strategies developed to help us fulfill our needs and reduce our anxieties.
Shadow.) The Shadow represents everything we refuse to acknowledge about ourselves that nonetheless impacts the way we behave.
The Enneagram describes personality types in terms of conscious patterns of thinking, feeling, and behaving along with their repressed Shadow aspects. As a result, it is an excellent tool for doing the hardest part of consciousness work: realizing, owning, and accepting your blind spots.
Our human (egoic) tendency is to want to feel good (and to avoid feeling bad) about ourselves. But without a way of recognizing, accepting, and addressing all of who we are, including the Shadow side and difficult parts of our experience, our personal growth stops and we remain asleep to our potential.
Self-Preservation, Social Interaction, and Sexual (or One-to-One) Bonding.
These centers represent the three modes of perception, processing, and expression: moving or sensing (kinesthetically), feeling, and thinking.
The “body” center includes the “motor” center (Points 8, 9, and 1), which takes an active part in all physical movement, and the “instinctive center,” which corresponds to our instinctual functions.
The “heart” center or “emotional” center (Points 2, 3, and 4) regulates the feeling function: the experience and expression of emotions. It allows you to feel your emotions and
The “head” center or “intellectual” center (Points 5, 6, and 7) regulates the thinking function: the experience and expression of thoughts, beliefs, and other cognitive activity.
emotional-motivational issue for each type. The passions are emotional (and often unconscious) drivers based on an implicit view about what you need to survive and how you can get it. Because the passions are motivated by a sense of lack, they create a basic dilemma or trap around which the personality is organized while striving to meet a basic need that never gets fulfilled.
The first step along this journey of inner growth is about self-observation as the path to dis-identifying from your personality.
The second step along this growth path is to look more deeply into what you are doing through self-inquiry and self-reflection.
The third task connected with this model is self-development.
“Enneagramatic paths” of transformation: 1) the Inner Flow of the change process following the arrow lines within the diagram, and 2) the vertical “Vice to Virtue” path of development: understanding your “Vice” (the unconscious operation of the passion) so that you can work toward embodying your higher “Virtue” (the antidote for the passion).
we can see the personality not as all of who we are but as a necessary survival mechanism, we can rise above this “lower self” and embody our higher capacities.
While we often don’t like to admit it, some level of conscious suffering is necessarily connected to growth.
The symbol is thus structured, fundamentally, by the combination of the Law of Three and the Law of Seven inscribed in a circle or unified whole.
Thus, they describe the personality in terms of a “Trifix” or a triad of types—one in each center—according to a specific formula in which they determine which point one is fixated upon in each center.
Naranjo clarifies that this archetype’s basis in “counter-repression” and always siding with and defending desires can, in a paradoxical way, make Type Eight rigidly intolerant of constraints.
Type Eight represents the “pro-instinctual” force inside all of us.
Having natural leadership ability, they tend to be honest, straightforward, and effective when it comes to getting things done and making things happen.
fun, generous, and intense, and this combination can make them great friends and exciting companions.
when they can balance their personal power and strength with a more conscious awareness of their own weaknesses, vulnerabilities, and impact, they can be courageous (and even heroic) leaders, partners, and friends.
naturally self-indulgent and excessive. The Cyclops episode in The Odyssey shows how unrestrained appetite and anger can lead to a power—and a downfall—that is larger than life.
Each of the three personalities in this triad, located around the core point of Type Nine, is shaped—at a basic level—by its relationship to anger and control.
Eights, meanwhile, have easy access to angry energy, and they often overdo their anger. They often move impulsively to express their anger before giving themselves time to think.
Type Eight individuals like to move things forward in straightforward ways. They dislike having to pay attention to details or consider what other people want them to do.
As “self-forgetting” types, they tend to minimize their own physical needs and natural human limitations.
Doing so supports their stance of being able to take on a lot—to work very hard and bear the burden of many responsibilities—even when this is detrimental to their health and well-being.
The main psychological defense mechanism used by Eights is denial, especially when it comes to the need to appear strong and hide vulnerability.
Eights sometimes believe they can change the way things are simply by exerting control over them, defensively imagining that they can direct the course of events in whatever way they wish without being subject to the limitations imposed by reality.
Perceiving these differences in power makes Eights highly attuned to situations in which people are being unjustly persecuted or those they care about are in need of protection.
satisfaction. They can be intolerant of frustration, so they scan their environment for sources of fulfillment: interesting people, fun things to do, good things to eat and drink, and challenging situations to master.
Eight’s lust is not limited to the realm of sex; rather, it suggests a hunger for many kinds of sensual stimulation and physical fulfillments.
lust should be seen less as simply an overriding need for (especially physical) pleasures, and more as a passion for intensity and the right to be excessive.
mental stance—when they are “in the trance” of their type—it may be much harder for them to observe themselves, see a larger view of things, and “come home” to the deeper, more tender feelings that point the way to their true self.
while they are fundamentally motivated to deny their vulnerability and exercise control in the world, they may end up creating situations in which they make themselves more vulnerable by not taking their natural human limitations into account.
they may end up not being in control through a failure to see the value of diplomacy.
When Eights deny their own sensitivity, they are more likely to be insensitive to others, which invites others to react insensitively and creates a cycle of aggression.
Once an Eight has a conflict with you, depending on the outcome, it might mean they’ll trust you more.
