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The energy of anger is gone as soon at it’s expressed, as if it’s been discharged.
So, instead of feeling hurt, they may unconsciously act out their feelings by focusing on getting even for being hurt.
If there is a vacuum of leadership, however, they are ready (if not compelled) to fill the void.
Eights value their independence and autonomy.
the actual nature of the influence they exert on others may be a blind spot for them. They can intimidate others without meaning to, and they can bring much more than the optimal force to bear on situations. While Eights can be very direct and straightforward in a positive way, they can sometimes be blunt to the point of being hurtful or insensitive when they don’t see how much bite may be behind their directness.
they can equate their own personal truth with the objective truth and not see the difference.
They can believe they are right about everything, or that their opinions are correct interpretations of what is happening, even if they aren’t necessarily seeing all of the data completely or accurately.
The Passion of Lust within the Type Eight shadow is thus portrayed in Dante’s underworld as a stubborn unwillingness for impulses to be restrained by any boundaries on satisfaction.
Social Eights are very sensitive to detecting situations in which people are being persecuted or exploited by others that hold more power.
They are very active, and they may lose themselves through constantly being in action. They may display a disproportionate lust for projects or for collecting things.
Social Eights also have a blind spot where their own needs for love and protection are concerned.
the Social Eight goes up against the power of authority out of a desire to protect the oppressed
Male Social Eights can look like Type Nines, and female Social Eights may resemble Type Twos. However, these Eights can be distinguished from Nines and Twos because they act in more direct, powerful ways, engage more readily in conflict, and express more power and control in seeking to protect and support other people.
then get whacked for thinking I know what’s best to accomplish the task or project.
experience me this way, I often feel misunderstood. Because of this dynamic, I feel like I have to monitor my energy and impact so others can be comfortable.
It is particularly important for Eights to develop a more direct relationship with their vulnerability and to have the strength to be seen as weak.
Self-Observation: Dis-Identifying from Your Personality by Watching It in Action
impotence. Notice when you are feeling angry and when you feel an impulse to act on
general, note how you exert power as a way to avoid feeling any kind of vulnerability.
If it feels difficult to moderate your expressions of aggression, think about why.
How and why did these patterns develop? How do these habits help Type Eights cope?
What painful emotions are the Type Eight patterns designed to protect me from?
The patterns that make up the Type Eight personality are thus a means of denying, avoiding, and defending against a re-experiencing of painful feelings that arose early on.
Why am I doing this? How do the Type Eight patterns operate in me now?
coping strategy of being tough, active, and strong.
What are the blind spots of these patterns? What do Type Eights keep themselves from seeing?
This quality makes it easier for people to care for you and get close to you.
To the extent that you actively keep yourself from seeing and feeling your own pain, sadness, loneliness, and inadequacy, you may thwart your ability to empathize with other people when they are having these feelings.
What are the effects or consequences of these patterns? How do they trap me?
Broaden your view of who has authority over the truth. (Or, How do you know you’re not wrong?)
Learn about limits.
If you push yourself to work harder and harder without observing your normal human limitations, you can make yourself sick or hurt yourself.
Eights sometimes risk endangering their health, their freedom, their relationships, and their well-being by resisting moderation and reasonable constraints.
Focusing on and acting from power and strength as overcompensation for denied powerlessness and weakness
Consult your head and your heart more before taking action.
Use your aggression as a clue to underlying feelings.
Reframe vulnerability and weakness as expressions of great strength.
It is therefore very important for Eights to try to recognize the truth of the counterintuitive idea that it takes a great deal of strength to allow yourself to be truly vulnerable
Catch yourself in the act of avoiding vulnerability and dependence.
Regularly inquire into your emotional depths and allow yourself to experience more of your feelings.
They can tend to dwell on the angry side of the emotional spectrum: impatience, irritation, frustration, and rage. Eights also have greater access to more upbeat feelings, like excitement, than some other types, as they don’t indulge in as much negative or limiting self-talk.
Make needs for love more conscious.
movement within the Enneagram framework. The connections and flow between each core Type, its “stress–growth” point, and its “child–heart” point map one kind of growth path described by the symbol.
The Eight working consciously in this way can make ready use of the tools healthy Fives use: analytical skills and economical use of energy and resources in support of self-protection and self-expression. The Five stance has a basis in observation, objective thinking, and a cautious focus on boundaries, and it can serve to balance out Eights’ tendencies toward impulsivity, excess, and intimidation.
Without awareness around the move to Type Two, Eights can act out the Two habits of “giving to get” and seducing through charm and helpfulness. They may compulsively and expansively do things for others, give advice, or express physical affection as a way of forging connections.
Navigated consciously, however, Eights can use the move to Two developmentally, to reestablish a healthy balance between attuning to others’ feelings and needs and asserting their own needs.
By reincorporating Type Two qualities, Eights can consciously remind themselves that it’s okay to care about what other people think and feel about you; and that it’s important to value your needs for love, understanding, affection, and acceptance.
They can use their Two “child–heart” point as a way of reclaiming their inner child’s need for care and affection and opening up to a deeper participation in the give-and-take of loving relationships.
the Vice (or passion) of the type is lust; its opposite, the Virtue, is innocence.
Innocence is a way of being that is free from guilt, pure of heart, and naturally connected to the flow of our animal wisdom and nature as a whole.
