The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem

by Nathaniel Branden

A subself or subpersonality is a dynamic component of an individual’s psyche, having a distinctive perspective, value orientation, and “personality” of its own;

Later, when they were back in their normal adult consciousness, they were mortified at their behavior—“as if we were possessed by demons,” one of them said. This is what it can feel like when a subpersonality takes over and we do not understand what is happening.

There tends to be a fairly strong correlation between how we relate to the opposite gender in the world and how we relate to the opposite gender within.

Learning to recognize a particular subpersonality, to isolate and identify it within the totality of one’s experience.

When we eliminate negatives, we clear the way for the emergence of positives, and when we cultivate positives, negatives often weaken or disappear. In recent years significant breakthroughs

That some children may come into this world more naturally self-assertive than others does not contradict this observation. When fear is absent, self-assertiveness is the natural condition of human beings.

the work had nothing to do with others, in the sense he imagined: it had to do with our relationship with ourselves—and with reality.

a person is unable to earn a living because of his (or her) own choices and policies—unconsciousness, passivity, irresponsibility—then that inability is a reflection on self-esteem.

But in the short term, self-esteem requires the willingness to endure discomfort when that is what one’s spiritual growth entails.

Layer of avoidance is piled on layer of avoidance, disowned pain on disowned pain. This is the condition of most adults.

we decide that our self-esteem and our happiness matter more than short-term discomfort or pain.