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“For you I will do anything. Anything.” As I return his embrace, I believe the earnest prayer he’s chanting in my ear, and I believe his words with my whole heart, but even Ben can’t stop the numbness settling around me, settling around my heart. I can feel myself withdrawing from him. From his love. From my marriage. And there’s nothing I can do to stop it.
When our eyes connect, I see danger, and maybe something exciting. Something forbidden. Some basic instinct in me instantly recognizes that this man doesn’t make love to a woman. He fucks her.
“I want what you have, though. Every woman wants that, a man who looks at her as if she were the only woman in the room. You’re so lucky to still have that.”
I can feel my barely healed heart slowly crack open again, the emotional stitches rupturing once more.
Missing you is a sickness I can’t cure, and it’s fucking killing me.

