Dirty Talking Rival

by Pippa Grant

was doing wrong without wading into know-it-all territory, and for the first time in my life, it occurred to me that there were people who would correct me because they cared, and not because they needed to be right.

“When life kicks you in the balls…” “I know. I know. Too bad for life, because you have a vagina of steel. My vagina’s feeling a little bit more like an overripe kiwi though.”

“I can’t decide if I love you or hate you right now,” I say. I think. It might’ve actually come out as a garbled plea for him to not stop. In Klingon.

“It’s none of anybody’s business but you and your hand lately. Which we need to change, because you can’t knead dough right unless you’re giving each of your hands equal whack-off time. Does that make you ambi-whacks-trous?”

Deep down in my gut, I’ve always known it was her or no one. Even when I dated other women, I’d think about the future, and I’d see Annika. She snuck into my head when I was fourteen, and I found the woman I’ve been soulmates with from the dawn of time.

She yanks me behind the neck and presses her lips to mine, and she’s not just kissing me. She’s devouring me. Stroking my back. Wrapping a leg around my hips and grinding against my hard-on while she thrusts her tongue into my mouth and owns me. Just owns me. If this is Annika being pissed at me, then she can be pissed at me every minute for the rest of my life.

Pop keeps asking when I’m going to settle down. I didn’t know it until just now, but there’s a reason I haven’t yet. I’ve never found someone worth giving up sleep for. Worth coming in second for. Worth going through life with. The good and the bad. The up and the down. The give and take. Not like I had with Annika in high school.

“You say chaos,” I tell her. “But the things that take us by surprise are what make life interesting.”

I step back so she can turn and put the cookies into the oven, and that smile dancing on her lips puts a smile in my soul.

I could fix it by myself. I really could. But I don’t want to anymore.

So it’s easier to be mad at him for keeping me a secret than it is to confess that I’m not really cut out for relationships after all.

“You’re the only person in the world who can break me.” His eyes are steady, but he can’t fully hide the vulnerability at the confession.

“Fuck being afraid. I love you. I’ve always loved you. I will always love you. Through time and space and distance, and burnt cookies and family crises and horny goats. All of it. We’ll argue and fight sometimes. But I will always come back. Loving you is the one thing I do better than anything else, and I fucking love loving you. Even when it’s hard. So yeah. I’m here. And I’m gonna shout to the world every day for the rest of my life how much I love you. Because I do. I love you.”

“You’re worth waiting for,” he says softly, like he knows what I’m thinking, and I thought I’d fallen for Grady Rock before, first in high school, then when he brought me ice cream, again when he figured out my secret and saved all our asses at Duh-Nuts, but I was wrong. I hadn’t fallen. Not like this. “I love you so much,” I choke out, and it’s hard, but so very, very worth it.

Because my heart takes wings and Grady pulls me into his arms, his breath going ragged while he blinks hard, and I finally understand what it means to be someone’s everything. It’s a huge responsibility. And it’s one I will happily bear for the rest of my life.