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of The Safety, Health, and Happiness Handbook, or The Book of Shhh,
The deadliest of all deadly things: It kills you both when you have it and when you don’t.
Hearts are fragile things. That’s why you have to be so careful.
“You can’t be really happy unless you’re unhappy sometimes.
But at that second the blue door bursts open and a streaming blur of cows—actual, real, live, sweating, mooing cows—come thundering into the lab.
The evaluators are hopping up onto the table now, as walls of brown and speckled cow flanks fold around them.
Some of the cows have wigs hanging crazily from their heads, and others are half-swaddled in gowns identical to the one I’m wearing. For a second I’m sure I’m dreaming. Maybe this whole day has been a dream, and I’ll wake up to discover that I’m still at home, in bed, on the morning of my evaluation.
You have to learn that people are always listening.
recording them, monitoring conversations for target words like love, or Invalids, or sympathizer. No
“I said, I prefer the ocean when it’s gray. Or not really gray. A pale, in-between color. It reminds me of waiting for something good to happen.”
websites full of unauthorized stuff—opinions and message boards and video clips and music.” “And you found one.”
Symptoms of Amor Deliria Nervosa PHASE ONE preoccupation; difficulty focusing dry mouth perspiration, sweaty palms fits of dizziness and disorientation reduced mental awareness; racing thoughts; impaired reasoning skills PHASE TWO periods of euphoria; hysterical laughter and heightened energy periods of despair; lethargy
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