Redeeming 6 (Boys of Tommen, #4)

by Chloe Walsh

Paul shrugged. “Someone tipped the drug squad off about a shipment of coke with a street value of six hundred grand.” “What?” My mouth fell open as awareness dawned on me. As I took in everything he wasn’t saying. “How would someone know to tip them off?” “Maybe someone has friends in the right places,” he offered, reaching across the table to cover my hand with his. “Maybe before they moved on, someone wanted to make sure his first love had a fighting chance with her first love.”

I dont like him... But...

Dammit, though, I hated that it had to be Darren. I would have preferred anyone else to walk through that visitors’ room door and that was not an exaggeration. Hell, I would have even preferred Gussie. At least he would have smuggled me some cigarettes.

“Darren.” I stood up and offered him a curt nod. “Please tell me those aren’t for me.” He glanced down at the flowers in his hand and choked out a laugh as tears trickled down his cheeks. “I didn’t want to show up empty-handed.” “I wish you had,” I drawled sarcastically. “You’re going to ruin my street cred in here.” “Nah.” He chuckled, closing the space between us. “You’re too notorious.”

The good doctor and Darren delved into deep conversation then. About my issues. About my recovery. About my sixty-day chip. About what a good little recovering addict I was. About bla-fucking-bla.

“Just come home,” I whispered, feeling a shiver roll through me. “Get better and come home to us.” “I am.” “Wow.” “Wow, what?” “You said ‘I am.’” I clenched my eyes shut as a wave of hopeful warmth washed over my heart. “Not ‘I will.’” Sniffling, I added, “You don’t know how long I’ve waited to hear you say the words ‘I am.’”

“So, you’re alone, queen?” “Yeah.” I sighed in contentment. “But it’s not so bad.” “No?” “Not since you called.”

“So, I did a little snooping of my own and it’s all true, Joe. He’s gone.” “Fuck.” “How do you feel about that?” “How do I feel?” “Yeah.” I shrugged. “I mean, I know you had this weird bond with Shane.” “Aoife, I feel like the weight of the world has just been lifted off my shoulders,” he interrupted me to say. “I was dreading having to deal with him.”

“Joey.” Her voice was laced with concern now. “You’re coming to live with us, and that’s final. I don’t want to hear a word of protest, and if you even think about going out on your own, I should warn you now that I have the nose of a bloodhound. You need only ask Johnny and Gerard. I will sniff you out and bring you home.”

“Can I do something to help?” she asked. “I mean, I would never force myself into your private life, Joey love. You’re a brilliant, capable young man, and I respect that you aren’t a child. That’s not the kind of relationship I want us to have, but if you need me to step in at any time on your behalf, then I am willing and ready to go to bat for you.” “You could vouch for me?” I said and then exhaled a shaky breath before admitting, “Because I could really use your help.”

“Now.” Turning her attention back to me, she reached up and pushed my hair off my face and smiled. “Let’s go, love.” “Go where?” “To sort this mess out.”

“I wouldn’t have made it to eighteen without her. Hell, I probably wouldn’t have made it to fifteen without her. You weren’t there. You didn’t see. I was a piece of shit. Sincerely. I was fucking terrible. To myself. To her. My behavior toward her was horrendous. I was the worst possible version of myself. And still, she stuck it out with me. She saw something worth saving in me, and she decided to love me anyway, and I am so fucking thankful that she did.”

“You tried to put a stop to my baby?” I bit out through clenched teeth. “Is that what you’re saying? You and Mam tried to convince Aoife to get rid of my baby?” “Okay, I think we should take a short break.” “I think he should answer the fucking question,” I snapped, ignoring my social worker’s attempts to defuse the situation.

“I was trying to help you,” Darren tried to explain. “You’re too young to be a father.” “I’ve always been a father!” I roared back, chest heaving. “And I’ve done a pretty fucking good job with the four I’ve raised. And yeah, I’m a mess, and yeah, I’m an addict, but I’m a good father! I’m a good fucking parent, Darren. I kept them alive. I kept them fed, and loved, and nurtured, and goddamn educated. I did that. Not you. Not him. Not Mam. Me. So, call me a junkie and whatever the hell else you want to call me, but don’t say that I’m too young to be a father!”

“Well, it doesn’t matter what you want, Dar, because this right here is my life,” I shot back, shaking. “It’s mine to live, and I plan on living it side by side with her. Because news flash, asshole, that girl is my life. Her and our baby. And if she wants a ring, she’ll get it. And a house, she’ll get that, too. And if the time comes where she wants more kids, then I’ll give them to her. Whatever she wants. Because we’re mirrors. Her and me. We’re aligned. That’s my future, Darren, and if you keep meddling in it, then you won’t be a part of it.” “You don’t mean that.” “I have never been more serious in my life.”

“You left me, Darren. You fucking left me with them. I loved you most. I looked up to you. I worshipped the goddamn ground you walked on, and you just disappeared from my life.” “I know,” he choked out. “Jesus, I know.” “I was twelve.” My voice was strangled and my chest heaving as I spilled my pain. “Twelve, Darren. When you were twelve, you had me. When I was twelve, I had nobody

This part hit way too close to home omg

“You can thank Gerard for those,” she said, pointing disapprovingly to the cigarette in my hand. “He smuggled three packets into the bags I packed for you today.” Good man, Gussie.

In his mind, if you could read, write, count money, and had a good head on your shoulders, then you would make your way just fine in life.

“She’s on the pill since June, love. I hope that’s alright by you.” The fact that she was asking my permission did something to me. She was treating me like an equal, not a child, and I was grateful.

“I can never repay you and John for what you’ve done for my family…” I paused and dragged in a pained breath, before adding, “For what you’ve done for me.” Fuck, I hated this with every fiber of my being. “I’m still not sure why you did what you did—or why you continue to help us—but I think it’s pretty clear that it takes a special sort of person to take in a family like you’ve done for us. I don’t have anything to give you in return. I don’t know if I ever will, but I’ll do everything I can to pay you back for—” “I love your family, Joey,” she cut me off by saying, voice thick with emotion. “Each and every one of you.” She winked. “Especially you.”

“How did they take it?” Edel grinned. “Ollie’s thrilled to pieces. Tadhg’s…Tadhg. Shannon’s been nonstop shopping for baby clothes. Johnny and Gerard have been stocking up on preventive measures, and Seany? Well, he’s a little young to grasp the concept of being an uncle.”

“I already told you that I’m not interested in any of this,” I reminded her, squirming in discomfort when she squeezed my cheek. “I’m not your boy.” “And I already told you that we’re keeping you.” She chuckled. “Finders keepers, Joey love. You’re mine now.”

Absorbing my old boss’s disdain, I stood my ground, unwilling to turn around and walk away. Besides, feeling unwelcome wasn’t anything new for me. I’d felt it my whole life.

“No clue.” I shrugged, uttering my truth. “But I’m clean today.” “Yeah,” he replied with a sniff, releasing my arms. “Good for you.” And then he slammed the door in my face.

Without a word, I collected every candle, wreath, and bouquet of flowers his family had left for him and tossed them over the nearby wall. “How does it feel, old man?” I asked, returning to his graveside and undoing the fly on my jeans. “To finally burn in hell?”

“I miss her,” I admitted, clenching my eyes shut when the tears started to fall. “I miss her so fucking much.” My voice cracked, and I choked out a sob. “I miss my mother.” “Your mother loved you, Joey,” Edel vowed, as she pulled me into her arms. “I swear it, love.” Tightening her arms around me, she stroked my hair with her hand. “She just forgot to show it.”

“Joey!” “O-ee.” “He’s back, guys. Look, it’s really Joe!” Shannon was holding a cake. Sean was sitting on Kav’s shoulders, clutching a bunch of balloons. Ollie was holding one side of a homemade banner that read Welcome Home, Joey, while Gussie, of all people, held the other side.

Why am i crying again

“Joey loves Seany back,” I replied, wrapping him up in my arms, overwhelmed by just how well his speech had come on since the beginning of summer. “Seany makes Joey the proudest brother in the world.”

“Okay, okay, everyone back up and let your brother breathe,” John instructed, when all three had thrown themselves on top of me—which wouldn’t have been a problem if it wasn’t for the big overgrown blond bastard who had decided to get in on the action. “Jaysus, Gibs, can’t you let them have their moment?” Kav growled, yanking his friend off the top of the pile before helping my sister to her feet. “I swear to god, you’re like a bleeding puppy craving attention.”

He beamed back at me. “It’s me.” And then he had the gall to hug me. He actually motherfucking hugged me. I was so taken aback from the sudden move that I didn’t react. I couldn’t. Not when he had my arms pinned to my sides in what I could only describe as the most uncomfortable bear hug of my life. “Believe it or not, Lynchy, I was half-lonesome for your big druggie head over the summer.” “Believe it or not, Gussie, I will take your rugby-ball-shaped head clean off your shoulders if you don’t let go.”

“Joey the hurler.” “Mister Rugby,” I replied, lips twitching up in a smirk that mirrored his, as I stepped forward and accepted his handshake. “Thank you.” With steel-blue eyes full of unconcealed emotion, he offered me a stiff nod. “Anytime, brother.” And that was all that needed to be said between us. He knew it and so did I. The respect he directed toward me was returned in a handshake.

“That,” she teased, stopping at the door of a freshly painted outbuilding, “is your abode.” Reaching into her pocket, she retrieved a set of keys and dangled them in front of my face. “I figured as soon as you got home, you’d be on the hunt for somewhere for your little family to live, so I went out on a limb and made a preemptive strike.” Grinning, she dropped the keys into my hand. “Like I said, welcome home, Joey Lynch.”

Now im bawling

This woman. Not only had she taken on my brothers and sister, but she was providing shelter for my little family. My little family.

“He has a couple of spare hurleys and sliotars stashed in the utility room,” John told me. “Somehow, I have a feeling that he would enjoy a puck about a lot more with his brother than with a bunch of rugby players.” My heart skipped a beat. “He’s still hurling?” “Like a demon,” John replied with a smile. “He’s hell-bent on following in his big brother’s footsteps.”

Still bawling

“I can do this all night,” my brother called out, letting another sliotar fly, clearly too busy taking fire to realize who he was firing at. “Pussy!” “Little shit,” I grunted when he got me in the nuts. “I’ll give you pussy.”

“On a scale of one to ten, how pissed are you?” “Fourteen,” he hissed, pulling on my hair. “And a half.” “What the fuck is this?” I laughed, bucking him off my lap. “Who taught you to pull hair? Shannon?” “Actually, it was your girlfriend,” he countered. “When she was screaming my name.” I narrowed my eyes in warning. “Tadhg.” “Yes, Tadhg, yes!” he mocked. “I’m warning ya.” “Oh, Tadhg, you’re so much better than Joey.” “You little shit.”

“Hey, Johnny?” Ollie asked, strolling into the living room later that evening. “Are you going to marry my sister?” “Wait for it,” Gibsie snickered, nudging my shoulder as he tapped away on his PlayStation controller in front of a giant TV in the living room. “He’s going to start getting stroke symptoms.” Smirking, I paused our game with my controller and turned my attention to the terrified-looking rugby player. “Good question, Ols.”

“But he bought balloons to play with you,” Ollie offered innocently. “And Joe says you only use those special balloons with girls when you want to marry them.” “I did say that,” I laughed, remembering back to a time when that awkward fucking conversation came up. In my defense, Ollie was eight at the time, and he’d caught me off guard.

“Did you burst her balloon with your needles?” His brown eyes were full of compassion. “Did you make her sad?” Everyone fell quiet, the laughing stopped, and I felt another piece of me die inside. “Yeah, Ols,” I forced the words out. “I made her sad with my needles.”

“Jesus,” I breathed, cradling him in my arms as my emotions got the better of me. “You’re here.” And then he opened his eyes and looked at me. And I was done. My heart no longer beat for me. For the rest of my days, it would beat entirely for the child in my arms.

“9lbs 12oz according to the midwife.”

For the second time in my life, I was a father. For the first time in my life, I had a child of my own.

He had a cute little button nose that reminded me of Shan, and puffy swollen lips just like the rest of us. Mam’s lips. We all had them. All six of us.

This money was meant for you, Joseph. Granda wanted to do this for you. For your future. And by God do you have a bright one ahead of you, sweet boy. I want you to take this money and look after your little family. I like her very much, Joseph. Don’t let her slip through your fingers. Trust old Nanny when I tell you that she’s a keeper. You’ll make a wonderful father and a devoted husband in time. I sleep well at night knowing that I have a grandson like you in the world. All my love, Nanny Murphy

Bawling omfg

“Oh my god.” I choked out a half laugh, half sob. “He has Shannon’s little nose.”

“Six years ago today, I locked eyes on you for the first time, sitting on the wall outside of school, and now we’re sitting here with our son.” Smiling, he leaned in close and kissed me again. “Thanks for my baby, queen. You still take the air clean out of my lungs.”

His words of affection broke the dam inside of me.

Me too

“It’s my turn, Molloy.” He kissed my hair. “To look after you.”

“Joe’s against it, but I want his middle name to be Joseph,” she told them. “And his last name will be Lynch.” Shivering, she added, “We’re not married, so it’s important to me that everyone knows our son has a father who claimed him.”

“Anthony,” Molloy said. “His name is Anthony Joseph Lynch.” Smiling, she added, “AJ for short.”

“You’ve decided to name your son after the man who raised you,” Trish said proudly, giving her daughter a huge smile. “Oh, Aoife, that’s a lovely sentiment.” “Actually, we decided to name our son after the man who raised the both of us,” I confirmed quietly. “Because, let’s face it, the only man I ever had to show me the way was your husband.”