He Who Fights with Monsters 10 (He Who Fights with Monsters, #10)

by Shirtaloon

“I think we may need to get you out of the temple more often, Acolyte Cassa.”

It was Marek’s intention to bring that same freedom to all the messengers, but Tera had shown him that it was even more complicated than he had imagined. He hoped that, with time and care, she would realise how rare and precious freedom was for their kind. But he recognised that the indoctrination was strong. Left to their own devices, many messengers given freedom would immediately surrender it.

“Because the easy way involves giving up all my secrets and all my control, Rick. If these people understood who and what I am, they would try to take me and control me, and that is something” I will not allow to happen.

Jason noted that getting to know Amos was essentially a matter of studying frown variants.

“You’ll deal with dying?” Hana asked. “It’s kind of my thing,” Jason told her. “Ask your boss.” “I am the High Priestess. I do not have a boss.” “You’re a high priestess,” Jason told her. “Your whole job is having a boss.” “You mean…? You should not speak so casually of the gods, Asano.” “So people keep telling me.

“The greatest martial arts trainer my world ever produced was asked by one of his students why he showed mercy to an enemy. He said that for a person with no forgiveness in their heart, living is a worse punishment than death.”

Mercy can seem like foolishness, and perhaps it is. But it’s also the hope for tomorrow. Ruthlessness will never turn an enemy into a friend. It leaves only barren ground, in the world and in your soul.

Jason resisted smiling as Amos and Marek looked at him with the exact same mix of exasperation, wariness and disbelief.

“Please be serious, Jason Asano.” Jason laughed.

If the price of me not killing a bunch of people is you putting up with the occasional A-Team reference—series, not film—then I suggest you suck it up.

The day is coming, Lord Pensinata, when you will need to grow a Tom Selleck moustache or get out of my way.”

If you say that’s for when I’m a big boy, I trust you.

“Oh, that’s great. Remind me to tell the World-Phoenix to bog off.” “No, Mr Asano.”

He was using Vidal’s surname, which was not a good sign.

“You would stand against the entire Adventure Society? Diamond-rankers and all?” “I stood against the Builder. More than once. And every time I did, I got what I wanted and he went away frustrated. Will you be the next to test my resolve?”

“As a priestess of Knowledge, you shouldn’t have such strong opinions on things you know very little about,” he told her in a flat tone. He gave no indication of having recognised the wild hypocrisy in his statement.

“A bouncy house?” Taika asked as they walked in. “Bro, this is awesome.”

Jason glanced at Farrah, reminded of their first lesson in aura manipulation. She had told him how adventurers and other powerful essence users used their auras like handshakes, which was explanation enough for a guy no one had heard of learning to meditate in a park. In high society, it was a subtle and complex game of supremacy.

“If I read this situation correctly,” Emir said to Musin, “your plan is to form an alliance with Jes Fin Kaal, who will absolutely betray us, and

A small cloud table rose in front of the director and he placed the cube down. He tapped at the runes in a complex sequence than involved turning the cube on its various sides. The glow faded, rune by rune, until they had all dimmed. Musin opened one side of the cube and removed a slightly smaller but otherwise identical cube and repeated the sequence. “Constance,” Jason said, “if there’s another Rubik’s babushka in there, I’m putting out a snack table. Is that okay?” “Why are you asking her and not me?” Emir complained. Constance and Jason both looked at him and his expression wilted to a sulk. There was no third cube but a blue sphere, twice the size of a fist.

The messenger leader is only willing to continue discussion if Jason Asano is involved.” “Is that because she wants a snack table as well?” Jason asked. “I need to find out about messenger cuisine, although I’m not optimistic. I’m picturing a lot of bran.”

That being said, I think you will find that decorum will serve you better than acting out like a smug teenage aristocrat.” The people in the room who knew Jason all winced, except for Arabelle.

“I really can’t. I actually am that simple-minded, so I talk about the films of Michael Dudikoff until people get distracted. People are starting to get wise to me, though: no one even asked me what a power sander was.”

Bynes burst from the portal at a full sprint, barrelling across the room in a mad panic. He stumbled on the bouncy cloud floor but didn’t stop, scrambling through the door and down the hall in a gold-rank blur of speed.

Allayeth turned to him, wide-eyed. “You’ve seen a transcendent rank item?” “I’ve used a few,” he said casually as they stepped onto an elevating platform. “I kind of go through them, now that I think about it. It might be one of my things.”

“Jason occasionally likes to push the limits of his translation power,” Arabelle told her. “I’ll explain later. For now, you were talking about transcendence.”

“You know your friend Charist is listening to us,” Jason told Allayeth. “I’m not going to go giving up my secrets for free. I want information in return.” “What do you want?” she asked, her voice sober. “You have to tell me everything about the sauce that was in that sandwich.” Arabelle slapped a hand over her face and Allayeth’s eyebrows moved upwards. “And I mean everything,” Jason said. “Where you got it, what it’s made of, what is the process. Are there variants? How are the ingredients cultivated? In what conditions? Who made it? Did they grow the ingredients themselves? How is it stored? Is there a difference when⁠—”

Arabelle made a coughing sound. Jason gave her a flat look but she maintained an innocent expression, saying nothing.

“He totally knows what a horse is,” Jason muttered.

“Let me grab a notebook and I’ll start going through some… Jason? Oh, you disappeared, that’s very mature. Come back here. I’m inside your soul, Jason. I know you can hear me!”

There’s a saying on my world about people who fight with monsters and the dangers of becoming monsters themselves.

“He still has some way to go,” Arabelle said, emerging from the fog that had once been a hospital. It was breaking down and pouring into the flask, but the process was a long one. “Jason still struggles with it,” Arabelle continued. “Less with the violence than his dark urges.” “Dark urges?” Allayeth asked. “Oh yes,” Arabelle said. “He has trouble standing still for more than a minute without explaining how dark and edgy he is to the middle distance.” Jason gave her a thin smile. “Because I keep finding myself in circumstances that make me confront these issues all over again.” “And you always will,” Arabelle told him. “You can whine about it for the rest of your life or learn to accept it without a near-constant stream of brooding monologues.” “I’m working on it.” “I know.”

“I’m getting a headache. Should that even be possible?” “It seems to be going around, Director.” “And by going around, do you mean around Asano?” “I do, although diamond-rankers tend to elicit similar symptoms.

“No,” Arabelle grudgingly acknowledged. “I suspect that it’s kind of his thing.”

“Why would it be me?” Jason asked. “I don’t have wind abilities.” “We don’t know that,” Neil said. “You’re always pulling out some nonsensical new soul power. It could have been spirit wind or something.” “Ghost farts. You think I’m making ghost farts.” “Ghost farts,” Clive said, “is where I leave in search of an adult conversation. Or a shower.”

“Okay,” Neil said. “Jason doesn’t have to leave.”

“The music’s playing, bro. Time to rock and roll.”

“That’s a good point, the whole victims-versus-enemies thing. You know, you could probably wipe out a whole city with those butterflies. If the city was full of your enemies.” “Being in a city full of enemies is something I’ll generally try to avoid.” “You say that, bro, but we all know what you’re like. It’ll probably happen and it’ll probably be your fault.” “You think there’s a city full of people that hate me that much?” “Bro, you blasted Metallica over the battlefield. I bet you freaked a lot of people out.” “That does not warrant a city full of mortal foes.”

“Well, you’re silver rank now; welcome to the next level. Do some meditation practise and see how it goes.” “Bro, I’m flying in the air and we’re still in a battle.” “Think of it like spiritual resistance training. I’ll be your spotter.” Taika’s expression turned thoughtful. “Like doing bench presses with your soul.” “Exactly,” Jason said. “Which leads me to one question: do you even lift, bro?” “Bro, that’s ice cold. Okay, let’s do this.”

“Bro,” Taika said as he got to his feet. “I think Humphrey might like old-man music. Do you have any Foster and Allen?” “No,” Jason said. “I do have some young-people music made so long ago that the people who made it are old now. Do you think he’d like the Hollies?” “If he doesn’t,” Farrah said, “I’m not sure he’s on the right team.” “You don’t get to say that,” Humphrey told her. “You’re not even on this team.” “She’s right about the Hollies, though,” Sophie said. “Do you even know who that is?” Humphrey asked. “Humpy, Jason and Farrah brought back a whole different world’s worth of music. Have you not listened to any of it?”

There was resounding silence in the voice chat until, finally, Gary spoke up, his voice trepidatious. “Did you just call him Humpy?” “No,” Sophie said, uncharacteristically flustered. “No!” Humphrey said, just as fast.

“Yeah, but it’s one of the fire ones,” Gary said. “It’s not accomplishing much. The heat’s making my undies a little swampy.”

“No,” Jason said, shaking his head. “I was like this before I acquired all the power. I act this way out of garden-variety arrogance.”

“Perhaps I could join you when you finally meet with her.” “I would appreciate that. I’ve always found diamond-rank backup to be useful.” She frowned. “Did I just become one of the powerful people that always seem to be hanging around you?” “I don’t think of them that way,” Jason said, “which is one of the reasons they choose to hang around.” “Then what do you think of them as?” “Friends.”

but the first approach should not be from someone whose idea of praying is ‘oi, god, get down here before I get cranky.’ They don’t respond well to that.” “I’ve never said that. I don’t think. Out loud.”

“I totally know how he’d do it,” Taika said. “He’d get a box and he’d prop up one end of the box with a stick. There would be a string attached to the stick so he could pull it and drop the box, and the string would lead to where he was hiding inside a fake bush that he made. The bait he put under the box would be a sandwich and a little card with the word FREEDOM written on it.” “You think I would try to catch the goddess of Liberty in a box?” Jason asked. “Yep.” “That tracks.”

We need to concentrate on the next step. We’re going to have some cranky officials waiting for us if we just wander back outside.” “Sorry about that,” Clive said sheepishly. “Hey,” Jason said, putting a comforting hand on his shoulder. “Who amongst us hasn’t defied authority or committed a bunch of crimes or rewritten city-sized chunks of reality in their own image?” “What?” Allayeth asked. “Humphrey, obviously,” Jason continued. “But the rest of us have all done something shady. Maybe not Neil. You need to get out more, Neil. Get drunk and steal a land skimmer or something.” “You leave Neil alone,” Humphrey said. “He’s a respectable young man.

“Jason once got stuck with a bunch of his gold-rank enemies in a dimensional space that was on the verge of ripping a hole in the side of the universe and wiping out our planet. Jason and one gold-rank vampire managed to escape, and the vampire ran and hid until Jason left the universe entirely. As for the dimensional space, Jason turned it into a magic city that his clan lives in now. It kills anyone who tries to get near it with ill intentions, and it’s kind of a temple to himself. And that was before he had his team with him, so, no, I’m not worried that a bunch of second-rate angels with mental health issues will do them in.”

“You said this device was dangerous, and that construct does not look stable.” “It’s fine,” Travis said unconvincingly. “Hardly any explosives are left on it. After the incident.” “What incident?” “I don’t think he’s allowed to tell you,” Farrah said. “I don’t remember the exact terms of the legal agreement, but the gag order lasted at least until the healers figured out how to stop the… I shouldn’t say any more.” “I don’t think he’s got any confidence in your construct, Travis,” Neil said. “Can’t you just take it yourself?” “I’m not going near that thing,” Travis said. “And you should be grateful I’m not. You’re the one who would have to figure out how to get healing magic to work through the interference.” “What interference?” Neil asked. “The magic on my nethers if there’s another testicular resonance event.” “Another WHAT?” Vidal asked as he tossed the pole and the device it was attached to over the balcony. “Hey!” Travis said. “I was joking; it’s perfectly safe.” The device hit the ground and exploded. Everyone turned to look at Travis. “Okay, ‘perfectly’ may have been a slight exaggeration,” Travis conceded.

“It’s fine,” Travis called up from below. “It’s all fine. There are no problems down⁠—” One of the construct’s arms popped off and went sailing over the rail with the thrum of a spring being violently unsprung. “It’s fine,” Travis called up again. “On an unrelated note, Farrah, could you wash down the construct from the green canister? Nothing dangerous is happening down here, but doing so very very quickly would be appreciated.” Everyone moved away from the construct that was now swaying on its feet.