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August 3 - August 3, 2023
“Because I don’t know if I wa...
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“I don’t want to lose you,”
“I didn’t want to lose you either.”
“Cam fingered me on the way to Hayes’s to get my car this morning.”
“So, I take it he’s not mad at you anymore?” I ask.
“No, he is. I just have a way of getting what I want.”
“Protecting me justifies why you left,” he sneers. “But go ahead and try to justify how you left. Tell me what makes it okay that you walked out on me the same fucking way my dad did.”
“And you didn’t think to fucking call me?”
“I always fucking want to be called when it comes to her!”
There’s a different intimacy with sleeping than there is with having sex.
I’ve never realized this until it happened to me
I close my eyes, willing for sleep to finally take me under, but every time it does, I’m jolted awake, thinking she’s gone again. I look over at her, seeing her staring back at me with a concerned look on her face.
“I just didn’t know he had a death wish. That’s all.”
“Oh. Well, I hate to break it to you, but he’s married.”
“Yep,” I tell her, looking over at Hayes. “His wife is a total bitch, but he won’t divorce her for some reason. I don’t know.”
“Every fucking ounce of your pleasure belongs to me,” he growls. “Get that through your head because it’s not fucking changing.”
“Mali put you up to this, didn’t she?” I ask, watching him intently.
“Ugh, yes. That girl holds sex over my head like it’s the fucking key to everything.”
“You can’t withhold sex from Cam so that he will ask me for information on my relationship.”
“Jesus Christ. I knew he would tell you. What a baby!”
“Mali,” I press. “Seriously. The only reason our friendship still works is because we don’t talk about that shit. If you want ...
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“Look, I understand not trusting her and having to work your way back to that. There’s a lot of damage to be repaired. But if you keep holding her at a distance, she’s going to give up, and that will be on you. I hope you know that.”
“Technically, he can’t because he’s not my boyfriend.”
“He won’t love me because he thinks he’s in love with you!”
“You are not allowed to fucking die on me, Blanchard,” she scolds between sobs. “I swear, if you don’t wake the fuck up, I’ll make sure everyone you’ve ever known thinks you have a tiny dick!”
