Assistant to the Villain (Assistant to the Villain, #1)

by Hannah Nicole Maehrer

He’s a murderer! Her conscience rebelled, but the rest of her, the part that wasn’t attached to her very wise brain, found him far too pretty to care.

The blood’s not great…but I was referring to the fact that you look like you were carved out of marble, and I just think that as a rule of thumb, inherently evil people should be grotesque-looking.”

“You just can’t kill people and be pretty. It’s confusing.”

“You’re touching my face,” he said flatly. “…Yes.” “Are you happy with that decision?”

Shaking his head, a small dose of wonder in his eyes, he said, “You are chaos.”

the thought formed on her lips before she could push it back

“You fall down often.”

He belonged to this, the night, the darkness. It was his.

I’d wanted you dead, I would have left you back there.”

“Normal” was for those who didn’t have the ability to stretch their minds past the unreachable end.

But she feared wearing something as scandalous as trousers would draw too much attention to herself. Women? Have legs? Alert the town crier!

Granted, she didn’t want to become evil, but when you spend most of your life trying to see the sun, you begin to wish for rain.

placing a hand on one side of her desk, leaning down in a way that put emphasis on his strong forearm beneath the sleeve of his rolled-up shirt.

her brain and her mouth seemed to have a swift detachment from each other.

do you honestly think me incapable of humor?” “Of course I don’t think that,” she said earnestly. “You hired me.”

“I’ll remind you that, at your bequest, I haven’t actually killed an intern in several months.” Evie shook her head hopelessly. “Sir, I hate to belittle your successes, but there are people who go their entire lives without killing anyone.” His face remained serious. “How dull.”

Loyalty was easy to acquire when the only other option was death.

“No wonder you have such a superiority complex. I would, too, if I could see the world from this vantage point!”

“I am not a charity case,” she said flatly. “What did I do that gave you the impression that I am in the habit of charity?”

If life was built on regrets, we’d have monuments the size of giants.”

Luck is something you will most certainly need if you ever bother her again.”

“My apologies—I wasn’t prepared for quite such an honest answer.” She shook her head at him, tsking with disapproval. “And yet you’re fully aware you’re conversing with me.” He nodded, looking resigned. “Fair point.”

she was addicted to feeling useful. Without it, what value did she hold?

You’re chronically underestimated by people.”

“I would never make the mistake of underestimating a woman like you. It would be a fatal one.”

Just call him over casually, perhaps say—” “Malcolm! Over here!” Evie yelled, standing slightly from her seat, cupping her hands around her mouth. The Villain put two fingers to his temples. “I’m angry with myself for even trying.”

lol

She was still there, breathing in front of him, with wide, confused eyes and in a dress that he refused to look at another moment or the table in front of them would find itself snapped in half.

oh he down bad bad

His brother raised Evie’s delicate hand, pressing his lips to the back of it. She laughed nervously, and Trystan wondered how his brother would continue to sling drinks once he severed that hand from his wrist and lobbed it across the room.

a man (jokes but not really because he's fictional)

The Villain turned, walking toward Evie as if in a daze. He draped her cloak about her shoulders, doing the buttons up under her chin. “It’s cold,” he muttered, turning back to his brother.

the nonchalance in this little service is through the roof and i am FIENING over it

“I quite like her.” “That seems to be the consensus. Now listen to the lady and talk,”

peak

I was a little…inebriated—” “You were drunk out of your mind,” Trystan interrupted. “Go on.”

lol

There’s a reason we’ve tried to kill each other for years and neither has ever succeeded.” “Because you’re bad at killing?” The Villain bit out.

lol got the man

“I’ve never felt more turned around than I have in the entire time I’ve made your acquaintance,

lol

The tip of my sword appears to be a fine place to rest.

feel

a bubble of anger curl so tight

a bubble of anger… curling?? how tf a bubble gon curl?

Evie prayed to be swallowed into the earth and perhaps reborn as a tree, where the only thing she would be expected to do was grow.

real of bro

Something dark was creeping into Trystan’s voice as he begrudgingly realized what it felt like to be wrong. It felt horrible.

yea it’s new for me too buddy

“You use too many words to say simple things,

feel

“There is so much that can be fixed by honesty, if you’re brave enough to use it.

“Do you hate her, Papa?” A singular tear rolled down her father’s rough cheek. “Some days, I wish I did.”

oh that made me miserable

Surely thoughts of mayhem and destruction would calm his sour mood.

yes, surely

But he was so happy to see her. What an obscene, unnecessary emotion, but there it was. He was happy… How positively vile.

tsk tsk look at you having positive emotions, how embarrassing

It hurt me. He wondered if it would scar her for life if he threw himself from the window.

he’s so gone bruh aww

What could he have possibly done to deserve such wrath?” “He stepped on my foot once. Never got over it,”

my kinda humor

“You’re not all bad, are you?” He looked offended. “How dare you.”

lol closeted softie

A little close for his liking, but he didn’t die, so there was that.

🙂👍

Evie,

her real name!

“He may be cute, as you so eloquently put it, but he has a temper.” “Hmm…I think I know someone like that.” Evie gazed up at him pointedly, and her boss rolled his eyes.

ok flirtinggg

“Oh dear. We are friends, aren’t we? How did I let this happen?” “Because I’m irresistible.”

and then I need to take a nap, preferably with a toasty fire in the fireplace and the pitter-patter of rain against my roof.”

same tbh