SIN-BIN (Sinners on the Ice #1)

by Anastasija White

Honey: You look lonely. Honey: I can fix that. You in? I lift my head and look at her.

Me: I have practice in 25 minutes. Honey: Your loss then.

She waves and strolls away. I give myself five minutes. Five minutes, and I’ll follow her. Who am I kidding? Only myself. I stand up from the table so abruptly they all turn their heads toward me.

I stalk over to her, wrap an arm around her waist, and pull her into my chest. “I missed you.” Ava leans forward, standing on her tiptoes. Her mouth is an inch away from my own. “Then prove it.”

“Say my name.” “Colt.” “Again.” “Colt.” My vision is blurry. My eyelashes tremble as I struggle to keep my eyes open. “Colt-on.”

“It’s mine, and I’m not sharing.”

“Lucky me is when your pussy is clenched around my dick, wetting it with your juices, and my palms are on your perfect tits. That’s what lucky me means.” “Kinda hate you right now,” I murmur as he gently kisses my forehead.

This affectionate side of him needs to go away, or I could fall in love.

“You were distracting me from my date with Damon Torrance.” She’s reading Kill Switch?

We hooked up twice after our moment in the library, and that’s definitely not enough for me. I miss talking to her, watching movies with her, doing anything with her, because she makes even the shittiest things better. But we’ve been texting a ton. We joke, we flirt, we talk about school, the books she reads, the shows and movies we both want to watch, new songs to listen to. I feel carefree and happy when she’s around, and I talk. I really talk. I tell her things I usually keep to myself.

“Is something going on between you and Ava?” The honesty of my answer depends on one thing only. What does he want to know? “Maybe.” “No matter what you think right now, she’s just my friend,” he says, straightening his back and squaring his shoulders. “We had sex, but that’s in the past. I have no feelings for her. I’m asking you this because I care about her, and I don’t want her to get hurt.”

“Why would I hurt her?” “Um, because it’s you. Thompson, I’ve known you since our first year here, and your reputation precedes you. Have you ever had a girlfriend? Or any type of committed relationship?” “What does that have to do with anything?” I ask, feeling perplexed. “Everything.

Two years ago, her ex did a number on her, and she hasn’t had a boyfriend since.” Benson licks his lips, looking away and staring at something behind me. “She was ready to lose herself in that guy, but now she refuses to be with anyone. So if she lets you get close to her, it means something. And I don’t want you to fuck her up even more than her ex did.” “I’m not going to hu...

“Is she the first girl you’ve ever liked?” I fix my hood in annoyance, furrowing my brow and looking away. “Yes.” “Dude. Are you for real? That’s amazing.” “It’s embarrassing.” “No, you dumbass. It means she’s special. Maybe even the one.”

Two weeks without Ava? I’m doomed.

I feel so alone, more alone than I’ve ever felt in my life. Because now I know the difference. What it means to have someone who makes my days brighter. Someone who makes me feel alive, who makes me smile a thousand times a day, even if usually I’m grumpy and hate everyone.

Her scent is no longer here, and I miss it. I miss everything about her, and it’s driving me crazy. I can’t touch her, kiss her, or be with her. Winter break chose the worst time ever to start.

“Do you miss him? Or is this just an act of compassion because you feel bad for him and want to cheer him up?” I feel my cheeks warm. I’m so fucking deep in my shit for this guy. “Ava?” “I miss him,” I admit. “And I feel sorry for him. No one deserves to be alone on Christmas.”

“You can invite him,” Dad tells me, cupping my cheek with his palm. “Drake suggested Colt could stay at their place.” “Good.” He chuckles, eyeing me with a smile on his face. “Something is telling me if I want to see you at home, I’ll need to prep a room for your new guy.” “He’s not my guy.” “But I’ll still need to prepare a room,” my father counters with laughter.

Me: So how about spending some time in my hometown? With me :) CT: Send me your address?

Something that was just supposed to be fun is turning into something incredibly serious. All these butterflies need to be murdered, or I’m afraid to even think about how I’ll feel at his graduation. I’m setting myself up to be heartbroken.

When I open the door, my eyes instantly lock on Colton’s. He smiles, and I’m a fucking puddle already. The guy is too handsome for his own good—or maybe my own misery. I still haven’t decided.

My father gazes at him with a tender smile. “Hey, Colt.” I feel like I’m drowning. Does he know him? It’s the only way to explain this strange reaction. “Hello, Dax,” Colton mutters. His voice is barely audible. I step closer, looking at both of them in turn. “You know each other?”

“My name is Dax,” he tells me, and I narrow my eyes. What does he want from me? “I was on my way home when I saw your mom’s car hit the railing of the bridge.”

“Hockey is important to you. It’s something you love. And when you felt like your world was falling apart, you grabbed your stuff because it’s a stable element in your life. Am I right?” “Maybe,” I snort. I was tense, and now I’m fucking smiling?

“Thank you so much for saving my mom, Dax. She’s the most important person in my life, and losing her…”

He said he has a daughter, and I envy her. Having a father like him must be great. I’m sure he’s not a douche like my sperm donor is.

“I’m Colton Thompson. Colt.” “You’re very welcome, Colt.” He extends his hand to me, and we shake. “I hope to see you on the ice one day. I promise to cheer for you.”

it wasn’t for Dax, I probably would’ve had a breakdown already. His presence and conversation helped me a ton. I’ll forever be grateful to him.

What the fuck is this? How is it even possible that the first girl I’ve ever liked is the daughter of the man who saved my mom’s life?

Every time I look at her, I fall harder. Sometimes it scares me, but sometimes, like today, I feel blessed. With how fucked up I was, I didn’t think I’d ever feel anything close to how I feel now. It’s a miracle she likes me back.

I’m pulled to her like a magnet. She’s my kind of orbit, and I revolve around her every damn minute of every day.

“I don’t want you to wait for me, and I’m kinda tired of being alone.”

He takes a sip of beer and grimaces. “It’s as warm as pee.” “Talking from experience?” I kid, and he freezes, staring at me as if he doesn’t recognize me. “What?” “She’s rubbing off on you. In a good way.”

He doesn’t do relationships.” “There are always exceptions,” I say quietly, and we lock eyes. I’m talking about Ava, and he understands it right away. “Someone who will make you forget everything and everyone else.”

Ava and some dude are arguing in the middle of the crowd. He’s tall and as big as a fucking bull, and I finally recognize him. It’s Jefferson. Her ex.

“Let.” I push more. “Me.” And more. “The fuck.” And more. “Out.” My legs are on the ground, and I look up, meeting his cold stare. “Move.” Rage is the only emotion I recognize. He rakes his gaze over my face, his nostrils flaring. My heart skips a beat, and my mouth falls open. What the fuck is this? Oh my God. I’m sick in the head—my fucking pussy is wet.

Colt inches closer, grabbing my throat with his palm. He lowers his face; his mouth is less than an inch away from mine. “Stop being a fucking brat.” His tongue traces my bottom lip, and my nipples pebble from the contact. “Get in the car and bend over.”

“How wet am I going to find you, Ava?” he asks huskily, unzipping his fly. “How wet are you for me?” And my fucking brain stops functioning. I lift my ass higher, hearing him tear the condom wrapper. I look over my shoulder and meet his gaze. “I’m dripping.”

“Does it feel good?”

“Maybe I should—wasn’t that what you wanted? For me to stop?” His movements gradually slow down, and I feel my orgasm fading away. “I don’t think you’re ready to come just yet.”

“Please, Colt…I need to come…please…” I whine, admitting defeat.

“Anything for my little brat.”

“Choke my dick, baby…just like that…”

“Do you want to go home?” “I want you to kiss me,” I urge him, and he grins. “Whatever you wish, Ava.”

I kinda need you here with me.” “I’m intrigued.” “I need to buy presents for Ava and her dad,” I say, putting on my sweatpants. “Could you say that again?” “Why?” I ask, grabbing a tee from the closet. “Because I honestly think I’m losing my shit. My best friend wants to buy gifts for his girl and her dad. For his girl and her dad. Colt, are you shitting me?” “No.” I pull on my T-shirt. “She’s not my girl. We’re just…seeing each other.” “Seeing each other? Thompson, can you tell me the truth for once?”

“Tell me this: if you’re just seeing each other, what happens if some guy decides to hit on her? Ava is gorgeous. It’s easy to imagine.” “I’d break his neck.” “That’s what I thought,”

“She’s very selfless, and she’s always there for her friends and family.” “And for you.” The pancake feels hard as I swallow. My throat contracts, and I cough. Dax slides onto the chair across from me. “Didn’t mean to scare you.”

“I’m not used to people giving a damn about me.” “Something tells me you’re not open with people either, that you mostly prefer they keep their distance.” “I’ve been told I’m a closed-off, judgmental asshole.” “Nah, you’re not. She wouldn’t like you if you were.”

You’re a loner, Colt, but it doesn’t mean you need to stay like that forever.” “The old version of me wouldn’t believe what I’m about to say.” I shake my head, heaving a sigh. “I don’t want to be a loner anymore.” “That’s nice to hear, because my daughter definitely wants you around.”