American Tabloid (Underworld USA #1)

by James Ellroy

Ava Gardner cruised by the pool. Pete waved; Ava flipped him the bird. They went back: he got her an abortion in exchange for a weekend with Hughes. Renaissance Man Pete: pimp, dope procurer, licensed PI goon.

Pete sipped coffee. “Tell me more.” “No, you ask.” “Okay. I’m on the Sunset Strip and I want to get laid for a C-note. What do I do?” “You see Mel, the parking-lot man at Dino’s Lodge. For a dime, he’ll send you to a pad on Havenhurst and Fountain.” “Suppose I want nigger stuff?” “Go to the drive-in at Washington and La Brea and talk to the colored carhops.” “Suppose I dig boys?” Lenny flinched. Pete said, “I know you hate fags, but answer the question.” “Shit, I don’t … wait … the doorman at the Largo runs a string of male prosties.” “Good. Now, what’s the story on Mickey Cohen’s sex life?” Lenny smiled. “It’s cosmetic. He doesn’t really dig cooze, but he likes to be seen with beautiful women. His current quasi-girlfriend is named Sandy Hashhagen. Sometimes he goes out with Candy Barr and Liz Renay.” “Who clipped Tony Trombino and Tony Brancato?” “Either Jimmy Frattiano or a cop named Dave Klein.” “Who’s got the biggest dick in Hollywood?” “Steve Cochran or John Ireland.” “What’s Spade Cooley do for kicks?” “Pop bennies and beat up his wife.” “Who’d Ava Gardner cheat on Sinatra with?” “Everybody.” “Who do you see for a quick abortion?” “I’d go see Freddy Otash.” “Jayne Mansfield?” “Nympho.” “Dick Contino?” “Muff diver supreme.” “Gail Russell?” “Drinking herself to death at a cheap pad in West L.A.” “Lex Barker?” “Pussy hound with jailbait tendencies.” “Johnnie Ray?” “Homo.” “Art Pepper?” “Junkie.” “Lizabeth Scott?” “Dyke.” “Billy Eckstine?” “Cunt man.” “Tom Neal?” “On the...