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“I’m going to kick you in the head when I get home. Repeatedly.” “You could try. You probably need the exercise since you sit on your butt in the office all day.”
p25
“I have an extra desk. If the PAD comes to shut us down, I might need sniper support, and I can’t shoot a cow from ten feet. We can turn our desks over and lob grenades at them when they storm the door . . .”
p32
“I’m sorry, milady,” I said. “Athos, Porthos, and Aramis just left.” “They said something about riding to England with d’Artagnan to retrieve some diamonds,” Andrea added. “You two think you’re really funny,” Rene said.
p37
My investigative technique mostly consisted of going through the list of interested parties and making as much noise as possible, until the culprit lost his patience and tried to shut me up.
p39
“Would you like me to pull over and ask that bamboo for directions?” “I don’t know, do you think it will answer?” We peered at the bamboo. “I think it looks suspicious,” Andrea said. “Maybe there is a heffalump hiding in it.” Andrea stared at me. “You know, heffalump? From Pooh Bear?” “Where do you even get this shit?”
Andrea raised her eyebrows. “Look at you, all high-speed.” “Yeah, you’d think I was a detective or something.”
Shapeshifter parenting motto—if your kid slits somebody’s throat, always have a backup plan to make the body disappear.
When unsure of the stranger’s intentions, the best policy is to open a meaningful dialogue. “Hey, dickhead! Who taught you to shoot, Louis Braille? That arrow missed me by a mile.”
“They really kicked me out?” “Refunded the tuition and everything.” Julie blinked a couple of times, coming to grips with that tidbit. “So what happens now?” “I expect you’ll be a drifter. Homeless and jobless, begging on the street for a crust of bread . . .” “Kate!”
p171
Andrea raised her hand. “This is the hand that slapped Aunt B.” “Maybe you should have it gold-plated.” “Here, you can touch it, since you’re my best friend.”
p214
Curran leaned to me. “You think she’s calling the cops?” “I would.” “Just letting you know, I’m not in the mood to be arrested and if they try it, they won’t like it.”
p235
“Help me, I can’t breathe, your ego is pushing all the air out of the room.”
p273
