From the Bookshelf of Q&A with Josh Lanyon…

Shades of Gray

Brooke McKinley

Start date: January 1, 2012

Finish date: January 31, 2012

Discussion: Book of the Month Club

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What Members Thought

Sep 30, 2011 Lenore rated it liked it

Shelves: 2011, major-roll-eye-moments, crime, meh, coming-out, reviewed-by-yours-truly, m-m, too-sappy, cops-and-co, tattoos

This wasn’t a bad book overall. There were two major issues though. One, the major WTF moments that had me rolling my eyes instead of concentrating in the story and, two, the feeling that the two heroes were too immature.

About the eye rolling moments. I understand that sometimes you have to ignore certain things in order to enjoy a story. I also understand that some elements may not be readily apparent or seem incoherent (notwithstanding the saying that the difference between reality and fiction This wasn’t a bad book overall. There were two major issues though. One, the major WTF moments that had me rolling my eyes instead of concentrating in the story and, two, the feeling that the two heroes were too immature.

About the eye rolling moments. I understand that sometimes you have to ignore certain things in order to enjoy a story. I also understand that some elements may not be readily apparent or seem incoherent (notwithstanding the saying that the difference between reality and fiction is that the latter has to make sense.)

In the case of Shades of Gray, those parts were simply too many to ignore. I was less than 10% into the book and I was already wondering why FBI agent Miller Sutton worked solo when all his colleagues work in pairs, how could law enforcers (supposedly the good guys) have left an offender almost bleed to death from a nasty cut across the ribs—a cut so deep, Danny could see bone—because they needed to secure his cooperation first, and how could a criminal of 10+ years in drug trafficking and his fair share of prison time be fooled by such a weak (or should I say downright laughable) plan to frame him.

Then there was the removal of stitches with a Swiss army knife (!) that didn’t even need to be disinfected because the wound was healed, or a patient coming to from major surgery (he had a bone fracture, a dislocated joint, a facial laceration that needed intervention from a plastic surgeon, a concussion from blunt head trauma, a ruptured kidney, a serious gun wound and ten fingernails missing) while still being transferred to the ICU from the operating theatre. The patient not only regained consciousness, but was also lucid enough to speak clearly and converse with two different people. That anaesthesiologist was something! And by the way, what were those people doing right outside the OR?

I won’t comment on how Hinestroza appeared in that abandoned house after arranging for Madrigal to pick up Danny. He sat there without anyone other than Madrigal to protect him, without even a miserable gun in his hand just in case. For a major drug dealer and a mobster, he was pretty dumb.

About the main characters. I had to force myself to feel the chemistry between them; it just wasn’t there for me. Miller had his issues before he met Danny, and Danny helped him start working on them. I get that. I also get how Miller helped Danny realise he wanted to try to become a better person. But where was the ostensible white-hot chemistry and the all-consuming passion? They were attracted to each other. All right. They had sex. Fair enough. But I didn’t feel there was any special element to it. People are attracted to each other and have sex all the time. How they moved from sexual attraction to desperate love remains a mystery to me. Also, their reactions and thoughts and feelings were more suitable to lovestruck teenagers than grown up men.

About the secondary characters. Rachel, the nondescript brunette who keeps waiting for Miller to set a wedding date after five years of engagement, felt like a pitiful woman who can’t see past her own insecurities, and Amanda, Danny’s loud ex-wife, felt like an empty-headed bimbo. What is it with women being portrayed like pathetic beings unworthy of love or evil witches in m/m? It pisses me off. Griff? He was used by everyone in the book. By Miller, to learn more about Danny and channel his jealousy; by Danny to get things he needed (e.g., a gun,) keep him company while he was in the hospital, or help him move. Yes, Danny felt bad because he couldn’t reciprocate Griff’s feelings for him but that didn’t make Griff seem less pathetic to me. I already commented on Madrigal and Hinestroza. The only one not acting out of character was Ortiz and he wasn’t even there.

Their “happy for now” was all right, it felt appropriate for their situation. To be honest, the way things were going, I half expected them to promise eternal love to each other and exchange rings. But the ending was more pragmatic and maybe added another star to this rating.
...more

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Nov 08, 2011 JustJen "Miss Conduct" rated it it was amazing

Shelves: mm, ebook

Loved this book. I started out thinking it would be just like other books about an agent hiding a witness away, but happily, I was wrong. There is a fabulous mix of emotions throughout this story. Both characters struggle with figuring out and fixing their lives in different ways. I will definitely be looking for more to read from Brooke in the future.

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Jul 28, 2012 Allison rated it liked it

Shelves: audio, 2019

3.5 stars rounded down, mainly for bad editing, but also a little for some things that pinged me (such as bi erasure) this time that I didn't notice before. But I will definitely give it credit for great handling of consent.

I really liked Danny, although I doubt a gay man could have been open in the hyper masculine environment of drug trafficking that he lived in then, I doubt it would be possible now so then, naw. Miller's reason for staying in the closet seemed a little weak since he had zero 3.5 stars rounded down, mainly for bad editing, but also a little for some things that pinged me (such as bi erasure) this time that I didn't notice before. But I will definitely give it credit for great handling of consent.

I really liked Danny, although I doubt a gay man could have been open in the hyper masculine environment of drug trafficking that he lived in then, I doubt it would be possible now so then, naw. Miller's reason for staying in the closet seemed a little weak since he had zero contact with the family that he mainly used as an excuse for doing so. But I can't imagine it would have been easy for him to be out in the FBI even though that wasn't ever brought up. I did feel and love their connection even though it was a little quick. It was unfortunate that both of them were involved with woman, but they were insistent that they were gay, not bi. Which isn't to say that doesn't happen, but it isn't as common as MM portrays. At the same time this was written a number of years ago so I will cut the author a little slack. What makes it disappointing is that consent was very well portrayed, characters often asked permission before touching or kissing each other for example. I'm not sure how I feel about the need for Danny to "redeem" himself especially as Miller didn't, it felt a little like blame. But it was great to see Danny find the ability to believe he could be more (although insisting paralegals is a "woman's" job was annoying).
I wouldn't suggest reading this if you want a realistic portrayal of the FBI or police work, but it is mainly meant to be a romance, and it succeeds.

My main complaint came in the editing. This could have been a few chapters shorter. Continuity was also a problem at times specifically with Miller's and Rachel's relationship.

Audio: not my favorite narrator, but not awful. I did find it odd that Miller and Danny were both from the same area of Kansas, yet Miller was portrayed with a fairly heavy southern accent. I know people from Kansas and none of them have that accent for one thing, but why would Miller have an accent and Danny have none, weird. I would listen to other books by this narrator, but I wouldn't seek them out. ...more

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Jun 26, 2013 Deanna rated it really liked it

Shelves: m-m, romance-contempory, adventure, grabs-my-heart, steamy

Two opposite characters who ignite when they are together. That is Miller and Danny. Miller the up-tight FBI agent who has suppressed his wants, desires, dreams and needs all of his life. Suppressing them first for his family and then for his job as an FBI agent. (Too bad he never met Ty and Zane.) He has been pushed by his family to be the one member who becomes something more. It is a shame that his family never understood that what they were was not less of a life. That would have made Miller Two opposite characters who ignite when they are together. That is Miller and Danny. Miller the up-tight FBI agent who has suppressed his wants, desires, dreams and needs all of his life. Suppressing them first for his family and then for his job as an FBI agent. (Too bad he never met Ty and Zane.) He has been pushed by his family to be the one member who becomes something more. It is a shame that his family never understood that what they were was not less of a life. That would have made Miller's life easier, but he would never have met Danny. Danny was his light to his inner self.

Danny, a kid who got more appreciation and attention from a drug load than his own family. Desperate to be more, no idea that college might be an option, brilliant with no place to go. That was Danny. He was offered a chance to make money and have responsibility. Danny wanted both. The drug load became a father figure. What did Danny know? He was but a teenager when these decisions were made, not a man. He learned to accept responsibility for his decisions, but never forgave himself for them. He could not believe himself good enough for Miller.

Yin and Yang came together when Danny and Miller met. The hard assed FBI agent using what he could to bring down the drug lord. Nothing else mattered. But something else did start to matter. Danny.

The characters were interesting if not always realistic. I spent 20 years as a criminal justice professional and never saw two such characters find true love together. Their story made me not care for that leap of faith required to enjoy the book. Realistic no, but entertaining yes.

It is hard to believe this is the author's first book. It was well written and flowed beautifully. I was so happy that is was not another straight guy who never looked at a man suddenly jumps into a gay relationship. Miller had always been attracted to men but pushed that desire into as small a corner of himself as possible. It did not fit the idea of a perfect life that he had accepted from his family and his job. It certainly was not erased from his desires as shown by his 5 year engagement to Rachel and his never understanding when others talked of how wonderful sex was. He led a black and white world. Danny's world was filled with shades of gray but he accepted that he was gay.

Their journey was rough and filled with starts and stops. It was impossible to see any HEA. Their previous lives (as expertly shown though flashbacks) did not seem to lead for happiness together. I liked that the story had the MCs having to accept responsibility for their decisions and take the consequences. There was no easy wrap up. It was an engrossing story told with heart and some realtiy. Well worth reading. ...more

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Jan 04, 2012 Tamela rated it it was amazing

Shelves: m-m, cops-pi-security, my-favorites, love-romance, adventure, adult-fiction, long-story, recommended

Great read. Danny and Miller are great characters, learning to know each other, then love each other, against all odds. And in the end, to love each other was the only choice.

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