Tomas’s Comments (group member since May 15, 2018)

Tomas’s comments from the Support for Indie Authors group.

The length seems to be just right - not too long and not too short. I think you should've mentioned it in the topic (not the blurb itself, obviously) it's a second book so we know it references something the readers would know from the first (as you've replied to M.L.). With that in mind, it sounds good.

Justin wrote: "Reviews aren't for the author they're for potential readers."
This, several times over.
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Anyway, I had an author like my reviews here on GR a few times, which I think as a nice token - and something you might do. A good reader will appreciate it, I believe.

L.K. wrote: "I occasionally have the opposite problem, where I gloss over some difficult to write scenes, such as sex scenes or violent scenes, in my earlier drafts and then find I have to add more detail in otherwise the story doesn't work properly - this is usually where the sex, or violence, causes a huge shift in the characters' relationship that just cannot be adequately shown unless the reader knows exactly what has happened."
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"I think whether you use the sex scene that you wrote or not, it was still a great idea to write it. Sometimes you can only figure out what should go in your book through trial and error, and practising writing different sorts of scenes is never a waste of time, because the more you write the more you learn what works and what doesn't."


My experience would support that. As I hinted in my reply, the first draft of the scene was very short. It was pretty much a bit of teasing on both sides, undressing, and going for the bed, at which point the scene faded out (and the next scene was the morning after).
When I made some changes to the story as a whole in the further draft, I've realized there's a potential to it, especially in showing the softer side of the male MC - his doubts and anxiety fighting with his desires (more so when it's the first time for both him and her). This was impossible to do without drastically increasing the detail to show his internal thoughts throughout the foreplay and the inner dilemmas he faces.

To be honest, I think my first attempt was worse. I can say it was around the same length though focused on the foreplay with fade-out at the moment of penetration.
Why am I saying this?
I don't know what is the exact purpose of the scene. What you should consider (and make sure the scene, if you include it, does that accordingly) is whether you want to show sensuality (which was my case) or lust (which seems to be your case) more - and what level of detail do you want to show.
By what I've been told by two very helpful people in this group, the build-up also matters a lot, because it sets some expectations for the reader when it comes to how the characters will behave, including in this kind of scenes - and which we don't have. If a character is romantic and sensual, the focus should be more on the emotional aspect. If it's to show a desire for release - which can very well be your case - then the scene you shared might be a spot on. It's hard to guess without knowing the context. Likewise, the 'damage' the characters suffered through the story can have an impact (such as one of them being possibly reluctant). There are many pieces to the puzzle, especially if it's at the end of a book, to consider. You, as the author, should know the characters the best and make sure the scene stays true to them.
So, what I can tell you is: consider all the aspects, write a few different versions of the scene and compare them if it might help.

Also, the target audience (especially age) matters. Since you mentioned it¨s a thriller, I don't think it's a factor (those are usually aimed at adult audience) but I mention it for sake of completeness.

Cierra wrote: "Hi everybody! Simply Inspired Words Publishing offers author services..."

Mind the 'no self-promotion' rule, please. Post removed.

Cierra wrote: "Hi everybody! Simply Inspired Words Publishing offers author services to help those interested in self publishing."

Please mind the rules, especially the "no self-promotion" rule. Post removed.

Terry, if you could elaborate on what exactly do you want to do? Have Goodreads list book that's not released yet? If it's already listed on Amazon (pre-order stage), it should be possible. You can also add a book manually (and later update it with ISBN/ASIN) and list the release date that way. Otherwise, as for Amazon-sold (e-)books, the data are pulled periodically, you just need to claim your author page (see post #222 just above) once at least one of your books is listed (either automatically or manually).

If your goal is to talk about the upcoming releases or otherwise push your books, then you should search groups with that specific purpose, within your genre, and see what you can do there (again, within their rules, so have a look at these).

I likely won't be able to respond in the next ~36 hours but I will be online on Sunday. If you mention what exactly you want to do in the meantime, I will try to help (and maybe someone else will react faster than I can).

Peter wrote: "If you possess a halfway decent command of the English language, you really shouldn't need a proofreader."

I am supposedly somewhere around B1-B2 level (good for someone pretty much from Eastern Europe) but I am not sure it's enough for book-level proofreading made by myself, mostly because I am prone to overlooking the small issues.
It's something I'll have to think about a lot when the time comes.

So far, I've been mostly throwing random tips around, but I'd like to get some feedback on the first book of my project as well. The details:
Title: Eternal Defenders
Genre: Sword and Sorcery fantasy with shadow vs. light theme, coming of age and romance elements.
Content rating: 15+ for sensual intimacy
Length: ca. 180k words (cut down from original 230k).

Current blurb (under spoiler tag to save space):
(view spoiler)[For generations, the blessed warriors and magi of the Order of Eternal Defenders had fought to defend their lands from the endless hordes of demons with unmatched expertise.
The legendary warrior Kraasian Darkwood lost friends and family to the demons. When Tyr'eshal, his twenty-year-old son, accepts the offer to wield an almost forgotten power, Kraasian realizes there might never be a better chance to defeat the demons forever.
The resurgence of an underestimated foe with their eyes set on Tyr'eshal and the challenges of waging a war with merely a dozen Eternal Defenders will test Kraasian and his hope. More so when the cost of victory might be higher than he anticipated. (hide spoiler)]

The focus of the beta would be mostly at story-based issues (potential plot holes, inconsistency) and flow. It was through some external feedback already so it should be in a decent state.
Edit: To clarify, I am looking for a free beta at this point, with a paid beta being considered for later this year.

PM me on Goodreads (do NOT post your e-mail in this thread where a spambot could see it) if you're interested. Feel free to ask questions in this thread, if you have any. I can also offer a few samples on PM request.

Thank you for reading.
Tomas

Just put "convert" into the mail subject and it'll do some base conversion. It's not as perfect as when it's turned into a "real" e-book but for reading my own drafts, it worked well enough.

Denise wrote: "Hi, again, I think I got it! Joining GR is not the same as joining their Author's Program and I need to do that. Jeez!! Thanks for all your help, Tomas! :-)"

Yep, that's exactly the difference. I'm keeping my previous response here in case someone had the same problem.

Setting up the name correctly is just the first step. Alone, it won't enable you to have author account/profile.
I've just looked up the guide again, so when your name matches what's on the book, you need to follow these steps:
1) find your book on Goodreads (the easiest way is to type the ASIN/ISBN into the search field).
2) from there, click the author name, which will get to the default author page. You need to merge this with your profile. To do this...
3) scroll down, there should be something like "is this you? let us know". Click it and follow the instructions. Then, you'll just need to wait for them to confirm it and 'promote' you to an author.

Rita wrote: "I find it much easier to write in the first person. I am currently writing in the third person for the first time and I wouldn't do it again."

I think it differs for everyone. I don't think I could write in the first person, even though it seemed likely for my current project before I started as I often thought the scenes through from the MC's PoV.

Kindles can also read *.doc and *.docx files so you can send those over as well by kindle mail.

Denise Shaw wrote: "Hmmm, my book has my middle initial. My GR page does not. How do I correct that? And thanks so much for the help, Tomas!!"

Sorry for taking my time to reply, I was tabbing between GR, a game, and going off to have a peek at the news as well.
Anyway, go to your account settings. There should be three fields (surprisingly) for first, middle, and last name. Edit those to match what's on your book.

Denise Shaw wrote: "So I need to follow the steps you outlined above to create the dashboard?"

Yep.

Denise, what do you mean by "dashboard"? The author page/profile on Goodreads? Or something else?

If on Goodreads, you need to follow a few steps. The first one is the name on your Goodreads profile must be the same as the name on your book, to the letter.
Then, go to the page of your book, and there will be something like "is this your book? let us know" (not sure how exactly is it written). Edit and correction for further reference: this is actually on the author page, not the book page - see post #222
You'll fill in and submit some form and they'll upgrade your GR account to author account in a few workdays (and should send you an e-mail when done).
Then, you can write your author bio and whatnot.
Of course, for all the above to work, your book needs to be in GR's database. If it's not, you'll need to add it manually.

L.K. wrote: "Just realised this was posted on the ask a moderator thread, apologies if I wasn't supposed to answer here."

Everyone is welcome to help others.

Their stance is that covers are not updated unless it was placeholder cover before release. If it was changed later, it is done by adding a new edition with the new cover (even if with same ASIN/ISBN).
Unfortunately, I don't know whether you're supposed to add this 'new edition' or just let them know about it. I guess the pairing/link needs to be done by them either way.

To Christopher: Since I am not on the published author side yet, I can only offer my own very personal and very biased opinion as a reader: I don't want to have my e-mail flooded by who-knows-how-many messages where I don't even know what fraction of them will be interesting. If I want to know about a favorite author's upcoming release, I'll just follow them on Amazon, their system will let me know about the next book well enough. I fail to see the appeal from a reader's PoV - and would actually like to see any proof, backed by numbers, of mailing list importance for authors.