Myths and Misconceptions

People have all kinds of ideas about what will make them happy. As children, we think if we can get what we want, we’ll be happy. Whether that’s a new bike, another Lego set or the latest Xbox game we just have to buy, we measure our happiness by what we can get our parents to buy us.

Some people never outgrow that idea; they become adults who measure their happiness by how much stuff they can accumulate. Instead of appreciating the things they already have, they look at what’s missing.

But happiness doesn’t come from stuff, stuff, and more stuff. Happiness is a byproduct of enjoying each moment of your life, whether you’re cooking a meal, reading a book or chatting with friends.

Success is another of those elusive things that we find hard to measure but are drop-dead sure will lead to happiness. In striving to live up to others’ expectations, we sometimes make ourselves miserable. Witness the number of young people who have gone to university without their own clear desire simply because their parents have told them to or because they’ve been led to believe no university equals failure.

Success is about waking up every morning and being able to do something you love. If you’re trying to live up to other people’s ideas of success you’re going to end up disappointing yourself. But if you find a way to make a positive difference that you can be proud of, the amount of money you make or the accolades you get won’t matter a whit.

The myth that makes me want to pull my hair out is this: I am entitled. Entitled to respect because I’m your elder or your boss. Entitled to be obeyed because I’m the leader of the pack. Entitled to your unwavering support because I call you friend. Hey, if you act in a way that creates respect you’ll get it. If you lead in a way that makes sense, your directions will likely be taken. And if you give unwavering support, that support will likely be returned. But nobody’s entitled to anything. If you want love, trust or support, you must work hard to earn it.

The misconception that most often gets in the way of achievement is the idea that “I’ll know when the time is right” to do anything. The law of inertia says otherwise. If you are at rest, in all likelihood you will remain at rest until you do something to propel yourself into action. Waiting until you feel it’s the right time will likely keep you right where you are indefinitely. Inertia is comfortable. Stepping out of that comfort zone is hard. But if you want to achieve anything in life, you must be willing to be uncomfortable, nervous, even scared silly.