Yoga For Beginners

Simon bounds into the living room, dressed in an eye-watering lycra outfit. It’s yoga time. Reluctantly, I drag myself off the couch to join him as he rolls out his mat.
We start with a few simple moves: The Childs Pose. The Cat, and the Down Dog, then the Cobra.
I’m thinking to myself, I’ve got this, but then Simon starts to shape up for some of the more challenging positions.
He goes into the Standing Bow Pulling pose, knowing I can’t get that one.
I lie down and lick my balls.
Never try to outdo a dog at yoga.