Comments on Hustling, Rushing

Some of you have been kind enough to like the poem. Although one of my friends had this to say.

“Good…just…hustling used twice….The word ..annoys…doesn’t fit comfortably.”

“Hmm…The annoys…means it’s a noun? Surely the noun is annoyances?”

So I made an adjustment and took out annoys and replaced the line.

Version 2.

Rushing, rushing

Frenetically hustling

Life is busy, full of strife

Where can I find the simple life?

Bustling, hustling

Ever tussling

No time to listen

Watch the world glisten

I need a space

To slow my pace

Savour the joys

Ditch antagonised

Centre myself

Count my wealth

Where can I find the simple life?

Inside myself, if no contrive

Finding a balance

Maybe semantics

Look at the mechanics

Life is too short not to enjoy.

Would anybody care to comment ?