Alas, poor Trash Can; I knew him, Horatio.

UPDATE: Alternatively, I am but a fool with wool upon my eyes. The poor thing was just startled and hiding against the side of my car:

 Original Post:
Granted, it appeared next to my house one morning years ago as an orphan, but I gave it a home on my back porch and fed it regularly, set it out along the curb to be emptied as needed, and the one time I decide to use it as a marker for my shoveled out parking space, some inconsiderate boob wanders along and takes the plastic trash can I've...