A Couple Of Days Later

His poems are full of danger, ‘all art is a result of one’s having been in danger, of having gone through an experience all the way to the end, where no one can go any further’.  This is what it is like to be an artist, he says, breath-catchingly.  You are unsteady on the edge of life, like a swan, before an ‘anxious launching of himself—on the floods where he is gently caught’. --Edmund de Waal, THE HARE WITH THE AMBER EYES
Paloma sent me a postcard that was postmarked from Laguiole, France.  It was a snowy scene from the LES MONTS D’AUBRAC.Paloma wrote: Dear Michael,Just a few words from a pretty little town under the snow…the knife of Laguiole is famous all over France.  I think I already told you.  We’re going back to Balaruc tomorrow.  So, how’s your new life in L.A. now?Write me.  Miss you.  Paloma

I was saving this cool BIKE card since 1986 when I bought it in Berkeley, CA.   The title of the card is CYCLISTS-NICE TRIATHALON.   I thought of sending it to Birda but I hadn’t heard from her in a while, so I decided to write to Paloma.   She knows how much I love THE BIKE.   I wrote her some of the latest happenings with a few white lies (including the fact that I didn’t disclose how I met Violet via a classified ad that I posted in LA WEEKLY):

Jan. 24, 1990Dear Paloma:I think this photo was taken in France because there’s a sign in the background that says “Jean-Pierre”.Did you receive your Xmas gifts yet?  I mailed them on 12-27-89 and I sent them by boat again, so it’ll probably be forever by the time you get them.
I really love the bike shorts and the tapes you sent me.   The bike shorts are HOT, too!  I love ‘em.I am here at work right now, pretending I’m working.I went to Newport Beach and La Jolla (near San Diego) last weekend with my friend, Alan.   He lives in Santa Monica and has two daughters (Lauren, age 9 and Carrie, age 6).  He is separated from his wife, Susan, right now.  I’m re-educating him on going out and the single life, I guess.   He’s a cool guy.
I met this bitch named Violet who is 36 (and looks younger) but she’s totally not my type.  I met her through a friend of a friend.   Anyway, she’s at the age in her life where she wants to settle down and she has the HOTS for me.  I can’t take her…she’s so knit-picky and she always talks about who she knows and who she’s gone out with, etc., etc.…Who cares?    She’s a total fake.  I’m slowly trying to get her off of my back but she keeps calling.  Oh well…whatever.
I don’t care too much for the people I work with.  I’m still here at PAC BELL Yellow Pages; they give good vacation time, so it’s hard to leave.   I’m still searching a little bit for a better deal though. 
As far as the model/actor idea…it’s not as much of an issue with me anymore.  Perhaps I’ll regain that drive for that again one day.  Right now it’s not as big a deal for me.  I just want to be HAPPY, first and foremost.  I am happy here now with the beaches and palm trees.  I just feel like I’ve been on a major vacation since I’ve been here.   Don’t give up.   Well, not yet.
How’s Jonathan?   The picture you sent recently was great.  You look as gorgeous as ever. 
So, you have a friend that lives in West Hollywood, huh?   What does he do here?There are so many restaurants here.  It’s great.  Many places have eating places outside and it reminds me a little bit of PARIS. 
I also met some Parisians at a club a month ago who live here and are in the garment industry.Thinking of You, Lots of Love, Michael

I also saved a postcard from when I was in Laguna Beach that was rather cute/funny.  I decided to write on it today and mail it to my mother:
Ironically, my mother would pass away exactly ten years later from the day I wrote this postcard (on Jan. 24, 2000).
MJA 1010 N. Palm #304West Hollywood, CA 90069
Jan. 24, 1990
Dear Mom,I thought you’d get a kick out of this one.   I found it at a Laguna Beach card shop.  I miss you.  I also miss your magic ironing tactics. Ha-ha.I can’t wait to confirm our BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFUL outing (even though I haven’t seen the show since I was at 356 Magnolia).I’m sending Ashley a card, too.Love You Lots, ME
A couple of days later I checked my mailbox and found a lovely, handwritten letter from my grandmother (mom’s mom), Mary Genevieve Leyba-Lucero.  She wrote:
Oakland, CAJanuary 26, 1990Dear Michael,
I got the pretty card for New Year’s and also the one you sent me of Sophia Loren.  You are getting to be like “Granny”, making your own cards.The wedding of Tanya Lucero was very pretty.   She had a beautiful dress.  There were about 150 people.  I wanted to go with your mother but she was sick.  She feels much better.  Thank God.Everybody in the club has been sick with the flu.  It has been so cold (especially at night).   Arthur went to Pennsylvania for a meeting for his job.   Michael Fritz (Sandra’s husband) went to Kentucky and Alabama on business with another guy from his work.Well dear grandson, I hope to see you soon.God bless and take care.  Love, Grandma
A couple of days later I received another handwritten letter from the old boyfriend, Chad.  He wrote:
1/28/90Dear Michael:Thank you for the custom postcard.  How was Joan Rivers?   And just who is VIOLET?  How’s the job-hunting going?
This should be my last semester.  I’m working on my MASTER’s thesis and oral exams.  It’s so much hard work!   I worked out in San Leandro and saw Mark Landreth there but I didn’t speak to him.  Do you keep in touch?   I hurt my right foot last Sunday while jogging around Coyote Hills and have had to stay off of it.  Do you work out any place?   Hey!  How about somehow sending me some pics of you and your new place?  I’d love it.
Spring Break is April 7th-15th.  If you’re up to company then, let me know.  That seems like a lifetime away.  Write when you can.  Your letters/postcards make my day.Always, CHAD
Well, needless to say, I didn’t want to mention to Alan that an old beau of mine was hinting about coming to stay with me in a few months.  I frowned and simply shelved his letter for now.  It goes into the abeyance pile.
A couple of days later I received a ‘Seagulls in Surf’ card from Dorothy Rua.   She wrote:
Jan. 30, 1990Michael,Great article you sent…and so TRUE!   The simple math really opens your eyes to what’s truly going on.   The reality of it is incredibly depressing.  The only way around it is to work at something you love and pray you can earn enough (to eat), shelter yourself, and enjoy the other things life has to offer.  But why is Michael J Armijo concerned?   Sounds like life in L.A. isn’t too bad!   Guess we can ALL use more time away from work, huh?I wish I was born with enough $ to cover the basic necessities for my entire life and only needed to work if I wanted extras.  That would allow me the luxury of exploring the jobs I found interesting.  I’d only work part-time, six months of the year.  I’d travel with (or to) friends!  What do you think?I enjoyed the MS. CAREER WOMAN creation you sent a while back.  I liked the neat sunset label on it, too!  So what are the details of those two trips you took?  Palm Springs?  San Diego?  It doesn’t sound like trips you’d take alone?  I bet you had an absolutely wonderful time with all of that sunshine, palm trees, etc.   Also, how did the interview go with the Interior Design Company?I had an interview the same day but nothing really came out of it.  The company wasn’t willing to pay my price but wanted all of my business contacts to expand their production.  Typical!Last week my friend, Dick (Advertising and Public Relations) and I met his friend, Don, for that meeting I told you about.  It was interesting and I picked up some valuable information…enough to ask myself, “What the heck am I doing here?”   The entire time we were sitting there eating breakfast at the Claremont in Berkeley I was wondering if Don (a high-powered owner of a successful Ad Agency in San Francisco) was wondering what he was doing across the table from two amateurs at 7AM?  It made me want to chuckle but I didn’t; however, I couldn’t keep that little smile off of my face!
Say…did you get the card I sent earlier this month?  It had a picture of the New Guinea Mud Men tribe doing their dance.  I hope it reached you.  Maybe I’m strange at times but I got a kick out of it.   How do you like this one?  I was in Berkeley a couple of weeks ago with my friend, Kathy, when I saw these colors.  It made me think of you, the purple and the ocean and the freedom of the birds.  I found a few others that are YOU also.  They’ll be sent eventually.When I received your article in the mail today I had just finished reading another in the paper here.   We must be on similar wave lengths.  What do you think?  True enough, huh?Oh, I also now have two (actually three) mailing addresses.  In addition to my P.O. Box and my home I get some of my mail at:1685 Locust Street #220Walnut Creek, CA 94596It’s actually just a mailbox.I’ve acquired this one form the ADVERTISING AGENCY I’m doing part-time for Dick.  I’m the only one with a key.I hope everything is back on course with you and Violet.  I’m still working on things on the home front.  I’m sure it will work out well!Love, Dorothy
Yes, it’s true.  I shared a bit of my dating and chat time news with Violet to Dorothy.   While I liked Violet I didn’t know where it was going and like she was more of a big sister to me.  She liked me but it was as if she was a real party girl.  It was the things she said.  Was it to impress me?  I wasn't impressed by her name dropping.  It must be an L.A. 'thing'.   She’d been around the block.  In fact, I think she’d been around a number of blocks.  I felt much more ‘at ease’ with Alan.  We both seemed to have such similar feelings about many things. 

A couple of days later while Alan was at his pad in Santa Monica and I was at my pad in West Hollywood I found myself looking forward to our phone calls.   One day he was meeting a business associate in Santa Monica at a place called the 17th Street Café.  He shunned a meeting with me to see this former Kidder-Peabody associate named Steve Goddard.   I knew where he’d be, so I drove to Santa Monica and decided to spy on him.  I was undercover.  I ate by myself in a corner and Alan spotted me.  He tried not to look at me.  I simply wanted to be sure he was meeting a business associate.  It was an older chap (not a good-looking young chap), so that made me feel better.   In the end, Alan loved that I came out to spy on him.
The strategy was in place, and the only unknown element was that of chance.  He nervously squeezed his pen in his left hand as he reached for the phone.  It was time to set the first phase in motion.--Paul Huljich, BETRAYAL of Love and Freedom