It Works With Tons of Perks!

Don't you love the fly by night crap? They always try and suck in a sap. It works they always claim. When it ends up being very, very lame. But I'm sure that you know. Still giving it a go though.

100% effective it is.
Listen to our biz.
We tested it out on 99% of all.
Shhh, all that was stationed in an abandoned hall.

You won't regret this.
It brings such bliss.
It will heal your back.
Shhh, may give you a heart attack.

We've got just the thing for you.
It was tested thoroughly at our zoo.
You may just buy two.
Shhh, we really tested it at a zoo.

Will make your life great.
Nothing else can relate.
Buy it now and have it forever.
Shhh, forever is a short endeavor.

As seen on TV.
That means it is great for thee.
If you see it in view it can't be wrong.
Shhh, just nod with the model and play along.

Guaranteed to work or your money back.
It is so good it will never lack.
We know you want it.
Shhh, there is fine print about that first bit.

The next big thing.
Grab your phone and ring.
You'll want it right now.
Shhh, it's not yet a cash cow.

You can't live without one.
It helps life a ton.
Get yours today.
Shhh, we may exaggerate what we say.

Get yours while supplies last.
They are going really fast.
Soon they will be all gone.
Shhh, our full warehouse doesn't know about our con.

Won't ever let you down.
It holds the crown.
You just can't get another.
Shhh, we're out to fool you and your mother.

Love these claims at your sea? Are they believed by thee? See these things in ads everywhere. They think they can just say something rare. Next up people shall buy. Pfffft, most of the time just one big lie. All a pile of crap. Tested on nothing but some poor chimp or chap. Oh, but it is 100% true for every landmass. Pffft again says my little rhyming ass.

Enjoy your winter, smash a printer.