Running with Sasquatch

Above illustrated by Andre Sargeant

I know some of you won't believe this, but for the past three years I've been trail running with a Sasquatch. When I first encountered the timid creature, it occurred early one summer morning on a narrow forest trail in the Comox Valley of Vancouver Island. I regularly ran this route on Saturdays, during four to five hour training sessions. Since few in the local community are crazy enough to join me running this long of a distance, I usually do it alone.
For weeks as I ran this route solo I had the feeling I was being watched, and a couple of times I heard footsteps and deep breathing behind me, but in the few seconds it would take me to stop, and turn to look back, whoever was following me would disappear into the thick underbrush. I gained my pursuer's trust one day by offering him bites of Cliff energy bars I had stashed in my Camel Pack, luring him into the open. Amazingly, it turned out to be a Sasquatch. He was able to communicate with simple grunts and rudimentary sign language. I gave him a Power Bar gel, but he didn't seem to like the taste. After taking a few sips he made a face, and tossed it to the ground, stomping on it with his big foot.
I slowly backed away, and carried on with my run. To my surprise, he followed me, keeping up with my pace. When he became thirsty, he stooped down on all fours at the river's edge to drink. We ran together for almost two hours that first day. I didn't know that Sasquatches were so fleet footed. Since then, he has joined me on numerous training runs.
When I qualify for the Western States 100 I'm going to bring him along as my pacer.