Knowing is Half the Baffle

 As you know, Bob, our household has to wake up at 5:30 am in order to get prepped and such in time to take everyone to school.  Over winter break, I'm happy to say that we spent two glorious weeks sleeping in until awoken naturally--either by sunlight or just plain having gotten enough rest.  Those halcyon days are gone, my friends, and OMG am I paying the price.  Particularly since, last night, I was scheduled to work at Maplewood Library.

Normally, I can't complain about my working situation.  It's utterly enviable, and I know it.  I hardly ever am required to work more than four hours a shift and I work... MAYBE once a week? Seriously, it's an awesome, awesome job with extra helpings of awesome since it is at a library and I spend my four hours surrounded by books. (So much AWESOME.)  Plus, other than the fact that I do spend all four hours on my feet, it is literally the easiest job in the world for me.  The requirements? To speak English well enough to know the order of the alphabet.  TBF, sometimes that's a bit hard for me, but mostly?  I got this. (Besides, there's this song I can sing when I get stuck on the alphabet, so you know a job is good when the hardest days are ones when you have to sing the most.)

BUT, okay, I have ONE SMALL COMPLAINT.  That is: evening hours at the library require me to stay up a WHOLE HOUR past my bedtime.  I thought  I might actually collapse from tiredness somewhere around 8:30 pm last night.  And this morning I've been almost hilariously misreading nearly every post I've seen on Facebook.  Hence, the title of this blog...  though I have to admit that I rather like the implications of "knowing is half the baffle," so that might become my new battle cry.

Speaking of new battle cries, I've decided this year that when I'm angry at some yahoo on social media, I'm going to insult them exclusively from lyrics in the Grinch song.  This morning I told Shawn that she was "a bad banana with a greasy black peel."  So, watch out, my friends.  If I'm really mad at you, you might see this in your in-box, "Three words that best describe you are as follows, and I quote: Stink. Stank. STUNK."

Of course, this is going to require that I have the song either memorized or at hand when I'm unreasonably angry, so probably this new year's resolution will go down the toilet pretty quickly, like most of them do.  HOWEVER, I'm going to Do My BEST as is often said in Japanese "Gambetta!"

I think this is a Very Important new years' resolution.  I mean, everyone vows to lose weight, eat right, and exercise more.  Me, I'm going to Grinch Insult people.

Mason has vowed to memorize the Periodic Table of Elements, so that's a nicely unusual one, too.  How about you? Anything out of the ordinary?